Killing the Prince
by PingPong Girl
Summary: Forced to kill the future King. Ended being the gay lover of his best friend. Became the maker of Yaouri boy-boy-girl-girl relationship Got seen by Hyuuga changing. Got my underwear stolen. Got blackmailed. Fell in love. So much for happily ever after.
1. Armageddon

The Perverse Grandpa and the Crazy Granddaughter

"You've got 3 more minutes, hurry up!!!"

I was panting already, but my iron fisted grandpa urged me on. Doing two hundred push ups wasn't easy, for average human beings. Doing 500 was even worse, but hey I didn't say I was any near normal did I?

My name's Mikan, I don't know my last name. No, I once knew it, but I buried it along with my past. I'm fifteen years old, female, and sadly, an A cup. I am a girl other people would call mediocre. I'm not that tall, but I'm not small. I've got simple looks but not gorgeous enough to win the hearts of all those willing males. But I'm not ordinary.

At the age of six years old, I learned basic martial arts, particularly karate, judo, aikido, and kendo. I was made to carry sacks of rice, two at a time, while crossing two mountains. It was also the dreadful year that I accidentally saw my grandpa "jingling" as he said it when I was hunting for a wild boar. And may I tell you, seeing your grandpa's thingy isn't a very delightful sight, it's more of traumatic.

At the age of eight years old, I earned the title of black belter in martial arts. I was also confronted with having cram sessions for archery and shurikenjitsu. My training escalated to carrying logs to the city, which is about two mountains and a two hour walk away. As for my near death experience, grandpa trained me how to determine poisons. What happened? Well he unintentionally placed a bottle full to brink of snake venom, thinking it was water, I drank my last two cups. It was a miracle I still survived. Grandpa blamed me for cutting our month's allowance for a half. And I blame him for being so irresponsible as to leave a deadly poison on top of the dining table.

At the age of eleven years old, I graduated from ninja school and attained the recognition of being the sole woman in history to ever acquire the Black position in our batch of males. I started accepting few missions that only requires stealth. I was forced to attend samurai classes run by the third son of the uncle of a friend of my grandpa's acquaintance. My training went from carrying loads to chopping trunks using a bread knife. Near death experience? Almost getting my head cut off by an amateur student who was bragging that he could cut a floating peach blossom petal even with a blind fold on, and seeing my grandpa's thingy once again when he went out of the bathroom because he forgot his towel in his room.

At the age of fourteen years old, I, Mikan, had finished my training and studies. I am now a full pledged assassin. I was often sent for more difficult missions that involve kidnapping, blackmailing and getting rid of people. By getting rid, I meant torturing, not necessarily killing them. I've circumcised almost twenty five men. Traumatic experience: Seeing those twenty five men's thingies.

See, that's not what a supposedly ordinary teen's life should be.

Grandpa excused himself for the moment, probably went off peeping at someone else's home.

I went in the forest to gather early morning dew. We don't have any of those pipes or luxurious bath tubs in our tree house, because for one thing we're poor, and for the other, even if we could afford a bath tub it'll probably weight too much for our brittle wooden house to handle.

I slowly poured the dew coming from the leaved into my water jug.

When I was done, the jug was full of fresh dew. Since I've got time to spare, I decided to do a little exploring. I haven't really scouted the whole mountain areas. Who knows? There might be a hidden cave here that has a chest full of jewels.

Like Tarzan, I swung vine to vine until I reached a dead end. I climbed the steep wall of rock with the aid of some boulders and grabbing on some safe shrubs.

Scratched and scathed I managed to arrive at the top without breaking a sweat. Making my own path through the compressed forest I reached the end. Another beautiful discovery. Unfortunately, it wasn't money nor was it of any significant value. But nevertheless the scene was breath taking.

I sat down near the cliff my feet dangling above two hundred feet of nothing but air. My eyes traveled from the slopes of the mountain covered with green trees, to the rowdy market place where I saw a thief getting caught by a fat lady who started hitting him with a broom stick.

Towards the west, the Lake of Tears lay. The name of the lake was derived from a legend, where old folks here believe that around a hundred years ago, a man confessed to a water nymph. The man never stopped meeting her even though it was prohibited for humans to interact with fairies. Gradually the man and the nymph fell into a forbidden love. One day, the man suddenly vanished and never came back to see her. So the nymph wanting to see the man again left her home to look for her lover. She searched for him through the vast lands, from kingdom to kingdom. And finally she arrived to a small village in Okinawa, where she saw her lover with another woman. Deranged she cursed him and the woman and their entire bloodline and went back to the lake. Since then, villagers claimed to have heard a maiden singing a tearful song. Oddly, sometime between the twentieth of December to the eight of January it was said that snow suddenly rises from the lake along with the water nymph hoping to see her beloved once again back to her arms.

If I were her, I'd give up. Love is simpleminded, not to mention burdensome. I had my fair share of love tragedies and rejections and I tell you loving and not being loved back hurts. Especially with this one boy, I never knew his name, but I used to play with him a lot. His parents happen to have a villa near here, so we often team up and play in the forest. But one time he was attacked by a lion, but he survived. His parents forbid me form meeting with him again. When he was about to depart, I managed to talk with him alone and expressed my alien feelings in words. He merely smiled, an angelic smile at that, and left. That marked the end of my first and only love.

Then, my eyes landed on the Royal palace. It stands out, the most, with its sky reaching towers and grand gates. Those gates were the entrance to every girl's dream. For others it may be because of the rumored handsome princes or perhaps the grand marble floors where a woman dresses up in elegant dresses and dance to their hearts content, but for me I only fantasize of three things.

Food-that I may never go hungry again.

Money-that I may never go poor again. And,

Private bathrooms-that I may never see my grandpa's thingy ever again.

Rich people sure got it easy. They simply have to wave, smile and fake interest about actually caring for the people. Whereas peasants, like us, have to work our butts off to earn enough money for food sufficient enough for the family. Rich people could order around their maids or servants or butlers or slaves and get what they want. Peasants, if order another fellow peasant around earns a good punch from that person. At a young age we become independent and earn for a living. Plus, rich people wouldn't have to go to the trouble of seeing their grandpa naked, because they would never see their grandpa naked! They have separate rooms and each one has their own bathrooms! Sorry, as I said it was a traumatic experience for me. I'm just taking my depression out.

I stretched my hands and heaved a sigh. I better get going. I've lax around long enough already. I'll definitely earn extra push ups for this.

Taking my jug I stood near the cliff and jumped.

I went home ninja style, jumping tree to tree and earning myself a dozen eggs at that. Can rich people do that?!

When I returned home, it was oddly quiet. Normally grandpa would get out of the shower and scold me. Instead, grandpa was waiting for me at the dining table.

He sat down drinking tea silently. For once, he looked like your typical grandfather unlike the usual underwear thief kind.

"Mikan, sit down." He commanded sternly.

I placed the jug down on the table and do as I was told.

"We have a new customer." Grandpa said.

That was good news. We assassins earn a living by getting hired by rich people and do things for them, the higher the risk, the greater the bounty. Most of them are aristocrats holding a grudge against a fellow noble. Sometimes we're ordered to kill someone. We demand a higher fee to those people. And when it's stealing we're talking about, we claim ownership of thirty percent of the item.

"What do we do?" I asked all giddy.

"This time, you'll be alone." He replied.

Cool, my first ever solo mission.

"So what does my client want?"

Grandpa was silent for a few minutes.

"Okay, fine, how much?"

"Five."

"Woah!!! Five thousand?! That's enough to last for a month."

I could even buy some sweets in the market form the leftovers.

"No. Five…" Grandpa stammered.

"Wait, don't tell me it's five hundred thousand!!!!!!!! Oh grandpa we hit the jackpot!!!"

Grandpa shook his hand.

"Then what is it idiotic old man!!!"

Grandpa looked me in the eye. His message came across. Grandpa and I have the ability to send each other a message by simply looking at each other's eyes.

"Five…FIVE MILLION!!!" I screamed.

With that we could build a normal house, and still have enough for our living expensed for years to come. Imagine the number of sacks of rice that I could buy using that money. And maybe, just maybe, I could buy women's clothing, cute dresses, instead of my loose cotton sweatshirts, dirty old shorts, torn up sandals and mysterious black cloaks. Even if I don't have the qualifications, I want to actually wear proper women underwear. I'm tired of getting grandpa's hand me down briefs. Yeah, that's right. I wear briefs, that was used by my grandpa no less.

"Don't get too excited Mikan. This is a dangerous mission. We're battling against the army this time."

"Eh? Does this mission have something to do with the capital?"

"Not just that. We are asked to, poison the Crown Prince."

My eyes widened. When grandpa referred to the army, he really wasn't exaggerating. He wasn't even close to the actual reality. Killing the Crown Prince would cost us our heads. The royal guards, the army, and maybe the armies of this kingdom's allies would send us to a wild goose chase. It's bound to result to riots all over the land and the countrymen would probably get involved in hunting us down.

"You're kidding me. Kill the prince? Not a second will pass before our heads will be chopped off."

Grandpa nodded.

"That's why I decided to turn down the offer. It's too risky. It would give birth to suspicions, and if worst comes to worst the kingdom will fall to a state of monarchial disorder, anarchy."

I've never heard grandpa speak like this before. His vocabulary only extends from common words to matters of the female anatomy. But right now, he seemed like an intellectual man.

Waterfall tears started gushing out form his eyes.

"Five million!!! FIVE MILLION! Five million!! FIVE MILLION! Five million!!! Five million!" Grandpa screamed like a mad man.

I punched him hard in the stomach. He went unconscious and slept like a baby. I didn't have sedatives with me so the manual method is the only option left to keep him quiet.

Though grandpa said stuff about the kingdom falling to a state of monarchial disorder, he doesn't really care about that at all. Because if he did, he wouldn't be stealing every woman's underwear at night. He's just worried about me. Messing with the royal family, is no joke even for a clown. Wa! Get it? No joke even for a clown? Ahem, excuse me. Getting back to the point. They'll certainly tear me limb from limb.

**OPTMISTIC THINKING:**

"**Your highness, I'm sorry but I killed your beloved son, the future heir of the throne." I said bowing in front of the King and Queen.**

"**It's alright. He was a pain in the ass anyway. What we need for this country is a lawful icon of justice!!! You should be the Crown Princess!" The King exclaims.**

"**Yes, that son of mine is worthless. Unlike you Mikan, you should be queen." The Queen would say.**

"**Oh, you're too kind." I'd curtsy and laugh at the Prince's corpse.**

Yeah right, like that would happen. But it's just wishful thinking though, if it were to happen, who am I to turn down the offer am.

I went to my room and threw myself on my bed, which was just a mat on the floor, so basically I threw myself on the floor, which hurt a little. The moonlight glow loomed over me as I faced the wide open window.

I really do love the darkness of the night. You could hear the crickets and croaking of the frogs. The air is cold and fresh. There's some sort of mystery behind it, and I like it.

"Stupid old man." I muttered.

Rather than living a carefree life, having a fine home with your own personal bathroom with a bath tub, owning your very own resort or buying a hundred Playboy magazines, my grandfather chose to protect me. Though it made him feel bad about it, he insisted. And though I could take on the job if he's truly up for it, he demanded I not.

I don't really get old people. Sometimes they'll lecture you about this and that and when you answer back respectfully they'll blow up and have a speech about patience even thou they're the ones who need it and then later they'll bake you cookies saying sorry and when you finished those plate of cookies they'll get mad again and have another long speech about dieting, glucose and high blood pressure even if they're the one's who should be taught about that. Get what I mean?

But I really am proud of grandpa.

And just to let you know, grandpa was once a gold medalist sumo wrestler and when he retired he became a world renowned runner. Being terribly fat and running fast doesn't mix, and that makes my grandpa even more amazing. His body may be that of an old wrinkly ready to die man, but his mind, heart and soul reeks of youth and his desire for teen aged women proves it.

Before I knew it, I dozed off.

And I dreamed of the day when I first saw grandpa's thingy. I believe it was a bad omen. It really is.

I woke up habitually early the next day.

The pale moon was replaced with the cheerful sunshine. The light blinded my eyes.

I yawned and rubbed my eyes. I stood up and went to my rat collection. Yes, I collect rats. For people rats or mice are merely pests, hideous beasts that munch on leftover food or destroy their new dresses, but my rats are special. I personally potty trained them and they also became my spies. Rats are very useful, especially for an assassin like me. First of all, their urine is a powerful poison. Second their very presence causes a disturbance giving me a chance to steal whatever goods I want. In other words, rats are my partners in crime.

"Good morning Lord Dougwell, Lady Ambreham, Samuel Harolds, Chancellor William…" I named my pets after their household owners. During my missions, I tend to bring home a souvenir. I prefer pets, mostly rats, but when I get nasty I steal snacks out of their pantries.

Taking my laundry with me, I headed for the nearby falls.

After undressing, I jumped from the tree in a cannonball position and landed on the water creating a huge splash. I shivered, the water was ice cold. I played in the water for a few moments then washed my dirty clothes.

I hanged the damp clothes on an extending branch of the tree.

I went back to the spring for a final dip.

The sky was awfully blue, like a deep ocean, and the clouds were like foam. The leaves of the trees shielded me from the sun's harmful glares.

The rustling of the faraway trees startled me. The water rippled, and the land shook.

Something was coming.

I dove and got a small stone from the bottom of the spring. With great force, I hurled the stone towards the probable origin of the loud thuds.

And what greeted wasn't pretty…it was absolutely cute!

A twenty feet tall…chick emerged angrily.

"Damn!" I cursed. It was a beast. This was the first time I've encountered something like this. Beasts are normally restricted to the public and are detained within the palace walls.

Swimming back to land, I snapped a branch ignoring my recently cleaned clothes now soiled in mud.

I prepared to throw my modified spear but stopped midway.

This creature is too cute for a beast!!!

Chickzilla (what I decided to call it) stomped towards me.

If grandpa were to see me now, he'll scold me for being vulnerable for sure. Speaking of which, where is he anyway!!!

So in the end, I scrammed.

A shadow loomed over me as I ran, and surprisingly when I looked up, there it was Chickzilla soaring in the sky.

Another thing, how could an enormous animal fly with just a pair of tiny wings?

There were indeed a lot of mysteries in this world.

Chickzilla was gaining on me. It had incredible wing power, comparable with my leg muscles. But I wasn't about to lose to a giant furball.

A loud whistle hurt my ears. Chickzilla stopped chasing me and turned right.

Curiosity took over me. I followed it.

"Piyo! My dear Piyo!!!"

Hiding behind a tree trunk I watched as a gorgeous boy pet Chickzilla. They, Chickzilla and the boy, were cuddling and swooning over each other, like a couple. It was disgusting. But the guy…seemed familiar.

His hair was like the sun, blonde and shining. His eyes were like the ocean, deep and cerulean. His smile was tender and his expression sweet and loving. Moreover, he was hot. Because of too much cuddling, three buttons of his white polo were open revealing a muscular porcelain chest.

I could feel my cheeks heat up. If I could recall, you call this abnormal reaction, blushing, am I correct? This was the second time that I've ever experienced this in my life.

In my vision, this boy had wings coming from his back, an angel that fell from the heavens. A silhouette hovering over his pale complexion. With a wonderful chest…

I wiped the drool off my face.

Chickzilla might've noticed me and glared at my direction. I couldn't react. My body froze as Mystery Boy's blue orbs met with my plain chocolate ones.

"Are you lost, Miss?" His voice was a choir of singing angels to my ears.

"Ruka." Someone called him.

"Ah, Natsume."

"Let's go back."

"Wait the lady over there---…" Ruka's voice trailed off.

I was panting heavily when I reached home.

Ruka! His name was Ruka!!! My cheeks began heating up again. We even talked, though it was only one sided.

I could feel my heart thumping faster. I took deep breaths hoping to calm my delicate heart but no matter how I try Ruka's face smiling was stuck on my mind.

"Grandpa! Grandpa!" I need a cure for this right away. Any minute now my heart might switch places with my pancreas.

I couldn't find grandpa anywhere. Could he be stealing women's underwear again?

A folded piece of paper caught my eye. It was on top of the dining table with a ring as paperweight.

It read:

_We have abducted your grandfather._

_If you want him back unharmed you better follow my commands._

_Before the royal Coronation be sure to eliminate the Crown Prince,_

_If you are cannot complete this mission before the Coronation, do not be surprised if you_

_Happen to find your grandfather's head in your living room._

_Beware,_

_--Your grandfather's abductors_

I clenched my fist and crumpled the paper.

They must've used underhanded procedures in order to capture grandpa. Grandpa's foolish enough to be lured out by D cup women or female lingerie. But he wasn't foolish enough to be easily kidnapped by some grudging employer.

If it weren't for the fact that grandpa holds our monthly savings not to mention my earnings, I would've been glad that he'll finally be out of my life.

"BAKA JIJI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The next day, with my clothes packed, my voice rusty, my pets in my bag, I made my way to the castle.

**Narrator: And so our utterly pitiful heroine chose the path of saving her precious underwear nabbing grandfather for the sake of her savings. In her path she will face with danger in order to achieve her goal. She will cross the deepest trench, and climb the steepest mountains, she will soar the foggiest skies---**

"Oh shut up. You're exaggerating." Really, narrators are of no importance, they're simply stuck up idiots with blessed with the ability of annoying others and good vocabulary that's it.

**Narrator: Hey, I'm working here. Back to the story…she will fight against the forces of evil, a duel between light and darkness, of deception and truth and achieve her success through perseverance, patience and determination.**

"I said shut up. And what the hell is perseverance anyway."

**Narrator: You don't know because you're an idiot. Now if you could be kind enough to allow me to pursue my script please shut your blabbering trout, you hoodlum!**

"Oh please stop speaking! Your voice makes my ears bleed!"

**Narrator: Hey bitch, if you keep on yapping you can kiss your happily ever after goodbye. **

"I don't intend having one! And I'm not a bitch!!! How dare you call me one?!"

**Narrator: Me?! I am simply doing as what I'm told. Argue with my boss, I'm innocent. And FYI, for a non bitch, you're bitchy!**

"Wanna die?!"

From afar, an innocent, pure minded, child trembles as he observes our heroine arguing with an unknown voice only she could hear.

"Ma, that woman's crazy."

**Narrator: Indeed, our protagonist really is crazy.**

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING CRAZY!!!!"

**Yo! !! haha! Sorry about my previous story, I guess I kinda lost inspiration…sorry to all those people who supported me, I ended up disappointing you. But I promise to make up to you, I'd rather die than not finish this fanfic!!! **

**Oh and be sure to try listening to this song: Your Call by Secondhand Serenade!!! Haha!!! Hope you enjoyed it!!! **

**MOST EMBARASSING THING THAT HAPPENED FOR THE WEEK:**

**I was watching the Single Ladies music video on MTV, I suddenly got a groove on so I started following the dance steps, you know with the hips swaying side to side and going down to the floor, but I didn't know my grandma had guests and when I turned around…TADAH!!! A group of visitors were watching me with wide open mouths!!! Haha! But at least I got a donation of two hundred pesos!!! Yeah!!!**

**Expect something better next chappie!!! Sayonara!!! OHOOHOHO! **


	2. She's The Man

**Path to Butler-dom**

**Narrator: In the previous chapter, our precious heroine who doesn't know the meaning of perseverance has been dealt upon a hideous destiny! Now, with a bizarre twist of fate, she is on her way to the palace to save her letch of a grandfather. However, the dream she had about seeing her grandpa's thingy, is no ordinary dream, it is truly a sign for an upcoming insignificant event. What could it be?!**

Facing the enormous golden gates before me, my tongue dry from arguing with that pesky narrator too much and my feet numb, I marveled at the artistic beauty beyond anything that I've ever seen before.

I couldn't believe I was actually two inches away from the entrance to the castle, and only a few kilometers from the same palace I've dreamed of going.

The most prized jewel in the kingdom is this twelve feet gate of ninety karat gold. If you're able to chop a portion of it you'd instantly become a millionaire but also gain a position in a line going for the guillotine. There is only one man in history bold, and stupid enough to cut of an inch of the Golden Gate. His name was Lord Abalkam Welber, an impoverished man from a neighboring kingdom. He pleaded for mercy saying he did because his land was in famine and he badly needed the money to feed his people. But the royal family didn't care. He wasn't part of their jurisdiction. And the law states that it's a high criminal offense to destroy national symbolic properties or steal them, so in the end, he died before his sentence for beheading. Suicide.

Yes, that's how cruel and powerful the royal family of Japan is. Not even the kings or queens of other kingdoms could stand up against them. And ever since the Hyuuga House claimed the throne, the royal family's influence and rule tripled. With just a snap of their oh-so-delicate fingers they could do whatever they want. And they have the privilege to sentence anyone they please.

Good thing there's no law prohibiting underwear theft, or grandpa would surely be sentenced to death forty four times.

"Who goes there?!" Two guards in rather pathetic armors in shades of pink and blue pointed their glinting spears towards me.

"I'm going to work here." I replied. Time pressured, I wasn't able to conduct a plan, and so I've got to trust my luck for this one. And sadly, I'm not a very lucky person. When I see a banana peel and try to avoid it, I step on cow crap. And once when I won the lottery, a thief snatched away the tickets for a two night stay in an exclusive hot springs and I was left with a consolation prize of a bowl of ramen from Yamamoto's Noodles, and when I got there, guess what? They already closed down.

"Oh, are you a candidate for the---"the blue armored guard said.

"SEARCH FOR THE PRINCE"S BUTLER!!!" they chorused as fake confetti poured down on our heads.

Butler? Aren't I supposed to be a maid? I'm female for god sakes.

Oh right, I was wearing loose clothes, and even with my shoulder length brown hair you could easily mistake me for a guy. And that's partly because I was flat chested, and tall, and my shoulders were a little too broad for a girl. And my chocolate orbs that inherited from my father are cursed with female grabbing pheromones. When I smile, my eyes pierce a woman's soul. Grandpa said my smile, girls envision me giving them a lustful stare thus turning them on.

Only few people has the perfect eyesight to distinguish my gender. And those are my grandpa, even though he only learned me being a female when I was six, and…Ruka. Though I heard it faintly, he did call me a lady. It's either he could feel my feminine aura or he had the eyesight of an eagle. Remembering the way he looked at me and asked whether I was lost, makes me all jittery.

"Yes. I am." I lied. But it was a chance worth taking. The Crown Prince never leaves the palace without a flock of armored guards surrounding him. The best option for me to take is to disguise myself as a maid or a guard. But for now, I'll seize the opportunity of becoming his butler. At least I'll be with him and most probably deliver food to him. It'll be easy to kill him.

"Where is your---"the pink armored guard said.

"RING OF ACCEPTANCE!!!" they chorused once more.

"Ring of acceptance?" I asked.

"The search is only open to the top two hundred males who sign in." blue guard explained.

"And those top two hundred gets a ring as a gate pass." Pink guard continued.

"In other words, you can't go in if you don't have the ring!" They said while doing a disgusting pose. (Hugging each other with their metal butts sticking out)

Ah! The paperweight that those abductors used!

I searched my pockets until I've found the so called Ring of Acceptance, how fancy.

"You may enter," The two guards, guard pink and guard blue opened the gates.

My heart thumping, I walked right in the vicinity of royalty.

It took me thirty minutes of running and ten minutes of walking before I arrived at the palace.

As always, no one could compare the majestic fountains, the skyrocketing towers, the smooth walls, the surrounding gardens or the aura of grandeur emitting from the castle itself.

I could smell the aroma of roses, irises, peonies and chrysanthemums enveloping the area. The garden itself was a benevolent view of pastel colors out of a painting. There were marigolds, carnations, freesias, cymbidiums and rhododendrons, a heart's content view for any florist.

But amidst the mixtures of colors and flower petals, a black rose bud grew in the center of the spherical garden.

Carefully avoiding the blooming flowers I approached the isolated flower.

I crouched down and smelled the black rose. It had a hypnotizing scent. I was consumed by loneliness, despair, anguish. It was a late bloomer, unlike the flourishing roses next to it. I can't help but be attracted by its eeriness. It's very enticing.

"You, what the hell are you doing."

Surprised I turned around.

Have you ever felt that sensation wherein your eyes made contact and suddenly BOOM you feel weird deep inside? I did.

As petals carried by the wind rained above us, we continued to stare at each other. His eyes, blood red, remind me of the black rose, deep, penetrating, sharp and…lonely. His skin was smooth, fair and white, unlike mine which was rough and scabbed. His hair dark, but not ebony black, was messed up and swayed with the wind. He was tall, unbelievably taller than me and his shoulders broad. His body was lean and masculine and his posture was slender yet strong. His hands were tucked in his pockets, and his rosy lips pursed. His right here had a ruby deactivator, a gadget used by Abnormal Humans, or humans who have abilities unlike any other.

He was staring at me with a bored expression.

"Quit staring." He said grumpily.

"Ah, sorry." I stood up and bowed apologetically.

"As I said, what the hell are you doing here?" he glared. Wow, easy…no need to be all angry about such trivial matters.

"Uh, I'm kinda lost. I'm here for the…SEARCH FOR THE PRINCE"S BUTLER." I said imitating the guards' voices just now.

"Hn." He pointed his index finger west.

"Ah, thanks stranger-kun." I bid my thanks and followed the direction of his finger.

"Interesting."

There were a total of one hundred ninety nine male specimens who joined the audition and one male disguised female. You all know who that is.

The buff men showed off their muscles, the sumo wrestlers showed off their thongs.

"Ha! Look at this beautiful baby!!!" One man shouted then started moving his man boobs. What a horrible sight that was.

"Meet Maria and Sarah!" A fat guy, a former sumo I believe turned around and bragged about his enormous butt cheeks. When I say enormous, I mean watery, saggy, floor reaching enormous.

An old man wearing fine butler clothing and spectacles went to the stage.

"May I request all of you to tone down your voices please." He spoke softly but we did what we were told. "Thank you. Now, we will commence the audition for his master's most creditable assistant. As you all may know, the duty of a butler doesn't merely stop at the level of protection. You are to serve, you are to respect, you are to follow, you are t cook, you are to do the laundry, you are to bow courteously, you are stay by his side, you are to conduct appointments for medical check ups, dentist check ups, dermatological check ups, car engine check ups, hair trimming, hair styling, pedicure, manicure, spa treatments, weekly massages, horse riding training, archery training, violin lessons, piano lessons, flute lessons, etiquette lessons, swimming lessons, fencing lessons, you have to create a schedule consisting of the time allotted for school, his lessons, extracurricular activities, miscellaneous activities, dates, visitations, royal house meetings, waking up, afternoon rest, evening slumber, taking a bath….."

Three hours later, five men ran out of patience and left. Half of us left dozed off while some began pinching each other to remain awake. I was part of my own group, the paid attention group. I am used to listening to non sense for hours because of my grandpa.

I saw the beard of the old man on stage twitch.

"WAKE UP YOU HOOLIGANS!!!!!!!" A total attitude make over. I wonder if the royal family are also two faced back biting barbarians?

"This audition consists of four levels that will test all three of your physical, mental and emotional attributes. First will be a test of strength, next is discernment, loyalty and finally the oral examination. If you pass the first three levels you will have an interview that will test your logical thinking and will." He explained while we listened actively. Most of us were scared out of our wits because of the old man's devious outbreak.

"Level one starts now. As you can see there is a ring here in front. I will call two numbers, your numbers are written within the gemstones of your rings, and those called will have a one on one match that limits you to three minutes. Within three minutes, you must either knock out your opponent or force him to surrender. Any player who steps out of the ring will be disqualified. Whoever wins will proceed to the next level. The losers will be forced to return home. Do not fret about the five people who have given up, I have already arranged five other players who will be taking their places. And so it will be just fair for me in someone to take his place. Rules are simple, you are not to kill your opponent, and, you may use a weapon. We will now commence the first match. Numbers 20 and 98!"

Two buffed up men went up he ring. They pointed at each other and began cursing and saying bad things about each other's mothers.

In the end both of them fell out from the ring and were disqualified. The next pair, a combination of two professional sumo wrestlers had a hard time going up the ring. Like the first, it ended with both of them rolling out the ring and getting disqualified.

The matches weren't boring. Some actually demonstrated cool moves, while others fought with dangerous weapons. But some matches weren't fair. The five players the old man summoned currently work for the royal family. But it was fun to watch how those royal guards easily carried and threw their opponents off the ring.

I was enjoying the matches so I forgot to pay attention to myself. I haven't fought yet.

"Number 1 and 188!!!"

I glimpsed at my ring. I was number one.

Some players snickered at me when I went up on stage. They probably thought how thin and frail I was. Unfortunately for them, I have no intention of taking it easy. I was already getting impatient from the previous battles and my knuckles were getting excited.

Since I'm a very unlucky person, I got matched up with a big, muscled royal guard. He was wearing a bronze helmet and armor and he held up a long sword. While I, a girl way smaller than he, went into stance without armor and without a weapon. He was one heck of a coward.

"Hey gur—ly, ready to take me on?!!!" He yelled which made the players go wild. They were cheering for him like this was some sort of real match.

"I'm not going to fight seriously with you since I know how embarrassing it is to fight me wearing a skirt." I pointed out.

Oh, I forgot to tell you. He was wearing some sort of armored dress. His exposed hairy thighs and legs make me want to puke. Imagine what your father looks like wearing nothing but a brief. Hat's how awful it is.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY BRAT!!!?"

He raised his sword and tried to slice me up, but I was way faster than he was and before he realized I vanished into think air I was behind him.

"Slow. Too slow bastard!!!" I gave him a hard kick in the ass.

I got to hand it to him. He was strong for he didn't fell down. He grabbed the ropes to break his fall.

"YOU DAMN BRAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He caught me off guard and just swung his sword spontaneously. Luckily, my hands managed to grab unto the sides of his sword and stop it before it cuts me in half. Now it was really a battle of force. If I get distracted he could easily use his full strength and slice through me. Like hell I was going to let that happen.

"How does the baby boy feel now? HUH!!!!!!" He exerted more force making me step back.

"Want me to cut that tongue of yours? You're all talk brat!!!!" I took another involuntary step back. My hands began to bleed. His sword was cutting through my skin.

"For a kid you're strong, but you're just a kid!!! A bratty asshole!!! HAAAAA!!!!!!" he raised his sword and using his full strength chopped down hard.

But he didn't heed my words. He was too slow. And raising his sword is an idiotic move. As the sword went down towards me, I laid down on the floor and jabbed my feet to his stomach. He coughed out blood.

"BASTARD!!!" Using much force I pushed his abdomen hard causing him to fly out of the ring.

The audience was silenced.

I stood up and dusted my shirt.

I went down the stage my head held high. I was proud. And even if I'm not showing it, in the inside I was maniacally laughing.

I totally kick his butt, right on!!!

"Number one is the winner!!!" old man announced.

The players erupted with different conversations. Some were too stupefied to talk but most of them are saying I cheated. I guess their pride cannot handle the fact that I, in their eyes, a small boy, defeating a muscled royal guard.

I sighed. Let's just see them talking when I win against all of them.

When no one was looking, I tore a portion of the curtain and wrapped it around my hands. It was a clean cut and was bleeding badly.

"Ow." I tied it tightly.

After all matches were finished, only ninety of us were left.

"For the second level, I prepared one hundred cups of tea. Ten of those cups contain an herb that functions as a poison when you add sugar in it. One clue is that when you add sugar in it, it emits a foul odor. The challenge is, I want you to find that poisoned tea from these cups without using sugar. You will be given ten seconds to choose a cup of your choice. After all has a cup of their choice, we will add sugar in each of your cups. The ten players who chose the poisoned cups will move on to the next level."

Maids in cute uniforms entered the room with their cup filled trolleys. The guys cat whistled and flirted with some of them.

"The tea cups has been set, remember you only have ten seconds to choose. On my mark, ready, set,…" Then he tossed his handkerchief. The boys darted towards the tea cups, while I remained frozen.

Was that a GO?

"Hurry!" One cute maid urged me on.

I rushed towards the table pushing men out of the way.

"Five seconds more!!!"

How do I know which cup has the poison? Luckily, I wasn't the only one problematic about the situation. Okay, time to focus. I grabbed cup per cup and smelled each one. But they smell the same.

"Three seconds more!!!"

Damn. I searched frantically for a cup with a slightly different scent but to no avail all were alike.

"Two seconds more!!!"

The cloth in my hand turned red and some blood trickled down my arm. A drop of my blood landed on one cup.

"One second more!!!"

I took the cup, it smelled…different. Very different. It was a poisoned cup! The poison reacted to my blood! If I could recall…blood contained sugar!!! Glucose was it?

"Time's up. Please go to that portion over there please."

All of us followed his orders and went to the area where maids stood in a line carrying a tablespoon of sugar.

I went to the girl who pushed me a while ago.

"Hey, I owe you one." I said. She smiled.

She was a pretty, in a different sort of way. She had long pink colored hair and a wonderful smile.

"Please place the sugar now."

Carefully the maids placed the heaping spoons of sugar in our cups.

Then, the old man came forward and inhaled the aroma from our cups.

"Numbers seventy eight, thirty three, sixty eight, forty seven, one hundred thirty eight, one hundred seventy six, one hundred ninety nine, fifty three, one and one hundred twenty four."

As I expected, thank you bloody hands!

"Congratulations." The pink haired maid said.

"What's your name?" I asked.

Her cheeks turned pink. Oh great, my first admirer happens to be a woman.

"Anna Umenomiya. Um, how about you?" she answered embarrassed.

"Mik---Mikaeru!" I almost blew my cover. Where have you seen a guy having such a girly name? It's bound to arise suspicions.

"The ten who have been chosen, please follow me." The old man waved for us to come.

"See ya Anna-chan." I bid farewell. She turned bright pink.

"Ah, yes, Mikaeru-kun." She waved.

The old man led us to a dark room.

"The third level will test the most important value of a butler. And it is loyalty. This here is the entrance to a maze."

A maid distributed a pouch bag to each of us. My eyes widened when I saw what it was. Gold coins.

"Within the maze you will encounter people who will tempt you, but they also hold important information. They will point to the direction of the end of the maze. You must reach the end within thirty minutes. And remember, your master is at the end of the maze. If you cannot reach him it means you have betrayed him. Also, once you reach the end, you are allowed to keep the remainders of your pouch.

We rejoiced. The pouch contains Gold coins enough to equal our life savings. This is going to be fun.

"The timer will start once all contestants have entered the maze."

We were asked to enter one by one with a gap of ten seconds each.

It was my turn.

Since the maze was too dark, I got the torch hanging on the walls. I couldn't hear anything. There were no other voices, no other breaths.

I trembled. This was like a haunted house. I may be strong, but I still have the soul of a girl. And that means being afraid of ghosts.

Someone touched my shoulder.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" I screamed.

I turned around. Phew. It was just a woman…with long black hair…that covers her face….with bloody hands…

I froze.

"He..he…he…do you want to die…?" she asked. Her fingers slowly touched my cheeks.

"N—o..no…no…" I stammered. Then I noticed her thumbs were missing. Tears formed in my eyes.

"Then…turn back…do not disturb me anymore…or else I will slit your throat and feed on your larynx…." She opened her mouth and her tongue went down reaching the floor.

"Please don't feed on my…my…whatever that was…" My whole body was shaking, but she continued to touch me with her hands tainting my clothes with blood.

"So….turn back…be gone…"

I took a deep breath. This maze is about loyalty right? So no matter what the situation I have to be by his master's side.

I muster up my courage.

"No."

"DO YOU WANT ME TO EAT YOUR FLESH!!!" she shrieked.

"Uh, no…"

"DO YOU WANT MY NAILS TO DIG DEEP IN YOUR HEART AND RAPTURE YOU ARTERIES?!!!"

"No…"

"SO TURN BACK!!!"

"No…"

For that moment the only thing I could say was no. I was scared to the core, but that's the only word that could escape from my lips.

"Very well. Walk to the end then turn east." She said then vanished.

I exhaled in relief.

I resumed walking.

BOOM.

I rubbed my temple. I got hit face to face with a wall. Okay, the Sadako woman said turn east right? Where's east anyway?

I drew an imaginary compass in the air. Oh yeah, east is right!

I turned right.

An old woman suffering from osteoporosis and holding a wooden cane stopped in front of me.

"Ple—ase co—ould you su—pport me..?" she stuttered.

"Sure grandma. Where are you heading?" I asked.

"Th—ere.." she pointed to the direction from where I came from.

"But that's where I came from---"

"OH! the pain….uh…." she knelt in pain and hugged her stomach.

"Grandma you okay?!" I knelt down beside her and panicked. What bad timing, I'm in the middle of a challenge here.

"Pl—ease…boy, I can't….stand….uh…" she nestled close to me, clearly in pain.

Wait. Snap out of it Mikan. I slapped myself. This was another test. Even if helping her is the right things to do, my master should come first.

"Sorry grandma, but I've got somewhere to go."

She stopped shaking and abruptly stood up like a strong ten year old.

I sweat dropped.

"Head straight, and then turn left two times." She said and continued walking.

"Creepy hag." I whispered.

I went straight and followed the deceiving hag's directions.

"Ho—ney…" A super babelicious hottie emerged form the darkness. She had the biggest set of breasts I've ever seen. And she was wearing a tempting bunny outfit.

She snuggled close to me and blew on my ear.

"Wha-what are you doing?!" I distanced myself from her.

I could feel the wall at my back. No more way out.

She went towards me and cornered me.

"Wanna have some fun…?" I could feel her D cup breasts pressing on my A cup ones. She licked her lips.

I began to sweat.

"Please let me go!!!" I was like an epileptic person. I couldn't stop staggering. My body heat's rising too.

"Uh…c'mon, let's do it." She tilted my chin. And her lips neared mine.

"I SAID NO!!!" I pushed her away.

Women…women are creepy creatures!!! We almost…I almost…kissed a girl!

"Eh? You're no fun. Fine, go that direction. Hmpf!" she said in an irritated voice.

Come down my heart. That was a near lips devirginizing experience.

I breathed in and out and after a few seconds I went on my way.

A mouth watering sight greeted me. There were stacks of luscious green, cold hard cash everywhere and sacks of gold coins. There was a giant treasure chest in the middle. It was full of diamond necklaces and rare gems.

An Arabian man sat at the top of a mountain of gold.

"You there! Do you wish to claim these as yours?" he asked.

I nodded immediately. Of course who would turn down an offer such as this?

"Alright. Get as much as you want and head to that direction."

I ran to the mountain of gold and placed as much as I could in my pouch. I could buy a million sacks of rice with this. I could renovate our tree house and maybe add separate bathrooms for grandpa and me.

I paused. Grandpa.

Though I couldn't fully admit it, I'm worried about him. If I don't kill the Prince by Coronation day, who knows what they would do to him. Strangle him and throw him from a cliff? Tie heavy rocks in his feet and drown him in the lake? Or worse….circumcise him?!! Even if he won't die from that, he'll die of sorrow. His petookie (what he calls his thingy) is very important to him.

Curse those abductors! Curse grandpa's petookie!

I dropped my pouch.

"Sorry, but I don't need these." I said.

"You are refusing the offer of immense wealth?" he massaged his long, curly beard.

"Yeah, I guess."

"How about having all of these for yourself?" he tempted.

I thought about it. Maybe I could bribe the abductors with money in getting grandpa back. But I don't even know who grandpa's abductors were, and how could I be sure they'll hand back grandpa alive? I couldn't take on such a huge risk.

"No thanks." I replied.

The Arabian man smiled and pointed towards a door.

When I entered, familiar room greeted me. It was where we gathered earlier.

"Congratulations. You have reached the end of the maze on time." The old man said.

After the thirty minute allotted time, only two other guys and I reached the end. I guess most of them got caught up with the sexy woman earlier. Just reminiscing the way she touched me send shivers up my spine.

"Congratulations once again, Mikaeru-kun." Anna said happily.

"Thanks."

I really did good, didn't I?

"For the final level, you will enter this room and sit on the chair in the middle of the room. Questions will be asked and you should answer these questions honestly and logically."

"What happens if you lie?" one guy asked.

The old man smiled wickedly.

"Then, prepare yourself."

For the fourth round, I would be the last one to enter. But that didn't make me comfortable at all. The old man's evil grin combined with the fact that I wasn't good with logic made me fret. And what if they asked me the reason for being here? Sure speaking the truth will cost me my life. But if I lie, who knows what comes my way? Judging by the old geezer's wicked smile, it ain't pretty.

"It is your turn." The old geezer escorted me to the room.

It was a dark room with a spotlight focused on the chair in the middle. This didn't feel like an interview to me, this was more of an interrogation.

"Sit down please." A voice out of nowhere said.

I sat on the metal chair and gulped.

"What is your name?" A more demanding voice asked.

"Mika…eru." I answered. Lie number one. Luckily, nothing happened.

"Please speak the truth." Do they have a lie detector or something?

"Mikan."

"Isn't that a girl's name?" I heard someone whisper.

"Ah my mom thought I was a girl at first." That wasn't at all false. Just partly. I mean when I was in her stomach she really did thought I was a girl, and came out as a girl. But these people didn't ask whether I'm a guy or girl.

"Your last name please."

Damn, could they possibly detect whether I'm lying or not if I simply made something up.

"Riyuzaki." Please! Please I hope they wouldn't notice. I stiffened my body and hoped for it. I lied once. Lying twice would make them more suspicious.

"Okay, Riyuzaki-san. Where are you from?"

"I'm live in the mountain near here." Which was true.

"Then, what is your purpose for being here?"

Why do they have to ask the questions I wanted to avoid?

"To become his highness' butler." Maybe I could move along the cracks.

"Further elaborate please." Guess not. What does elaborate even mean.

Not knowing what to say I just said what was on my mind.

"We're in need of money. So I went here." That certainly wasn't a lie. We are in dire need of money to pay for our food and bills.

"So you're in here for the money eh?" A deep voice said.

"Yes."

"So Riyuzaki-kun I heard you're a good fighter, are you familiar with any martial arts?"

"Yes. I've mastered all basic martial arts, like karate, judo, taekwondo, Mu Du Kwan and aikido."

"Oh, you're very good then I believe. How about home economics?"

"I do most of the household chores."

"Do you know how to wash?"

"Yes."

"Do you know how to cook, iron, table set?"

"I believe so." I knew how to set the table. Just put a plate, and chopsticks. Why do they have to ask questions related to common sense?

"Riyuzaki-kun I have a question, please answer sincerely. What will you do if you're master orders you to do something ill natured?"

"I won't do it." I won't be bossed around by some prince. I'll only do the dirty work if there's money involved.

"Why? Your master's word is law."

"A relationship between master and butler is formed by trust. I know my master won't command me to do bad things."

I could hear murmurs and whispers.

"Lastly Riyuzaki-kun," a soft voice spoke, "are you afraid of getting burnt?"

"No."

Suddenly a ball of fire went towards me.

Using my right hand, I sliced right through it with superhuman speed. After all, there's no fire without oxygen right? I'm uneducated but I learned those stuff based on experience in the mountains.

"Thank you Riyuzaki-kun. Please exit for now."

I thanked them and bowed before leaving.

"How did it go Mikaeru-kun?" Anna asked me.

"It went well." The odds of me being favored by the judges are one against one. I lied about my name that would probably bring me down. But I did defend myself from the fire in a cool way. Where did that fire ball come from anyway?

"The fourth round has ended and we will be announcing the results after ten minutes. Please feel free to spend your time leisurely as we wait for the final decision."

With those ten minutes, Anna brought me pastries and orange juice much to the disappointment to the other guys who wanted to have a bite too.

One guy asked for a drink but I shrugged him off. The other pleaded for some bread but I just stuck my tongue out at him. That's for laughing at me earlier.

"The judges had a hard time in choosing one of you. If you are not chosen please be honored for making it this far. As for the winner, we present to you our trust and we bid you high hopes of watching over young master.

"And the won chosen is---!!!!"

My heart pounded loudly of anxiety. Please…please…please…

"Number……..ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY SIX!!!"

My heart sank.

"Could that be a typo error?"

**Narrator: Of course not genius. My typing's perfect and flawless. I warned didn't I? Mess with me and I mess with your life. Haha!**

"Oh c'mon. Grandpa's life is on the line here."

**Narrator: Oh, fine. I'll forgive if you call me a compassionate, merciful, wonderful narrator from now on.**

"That's disgusting."

**Narrator: Do or die my dear? Your fate's in my hands and keyboard!**

"Fine. Please oh compassionate, merciful, wonderful narrator." My voice was dripping with sarcasm.

**Narrator: Why thank you. And as I promised…**

My fellow players had already gone and I was the only one left.

I was about to leave when the old man called me.

"We have another job perfect for your skills. And you'll still be working with his highness. Would you accept it?"

Thank you irritating narrator!!!

"Yes of course!!!"

"Then I leave him in your hands." The old man took my hands and cried.

Wait, what the heck is he talking about?

"Anna-dono will escort you to your chambers. Please watch over his young master from now on." The old man wiped his tears using a cloth and left.

"Hey what's the job anyway?! Oy old man!"

**Narrator: What kind of job befalls upon our pathetic heroine? FIND OUT!!!**

"Now I'm pathetic!!! Damn narrator!"

**Narrator: Do you want me to ruin your life?**

"No…"

Anna simply watched as our heroine began to argue with a voice only she could hear.

"Mikaeru-kun's weird."

**Narrator: Yes, our heroine really is weird.**

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING WEIRD!!!!!!!!!"

**Yo pipz! Haha hope you enjoyed it!!! Romance will be coming soon so hold your horses kay'?!!! **

**I would like to extend my blessings to the ff:**

**tAnGeRiNe_jUjUbE08****-cool account name! Mikan means tangerine right? And Natsume means jujube, right? Tnx for the review you gave me!!!**

**pinkblossom13****-You're also the best, seriously! Haha! Hope we can be friends!!! YEAH! Thanks for the review hope you keep givin' more…haha juz kiddin'! Perverted grandpas rock!!!**

**Kazukarin****-Hehe! I guess I'm sort of an idiot too fighting with myself even though it was my fanfic…but at least it makes you laugh right? Haha! Thank you very much!!!**

**luvnstuff101****-Thanks for the review!!! Oh and here you are, I updated soon! BE THANKFUL!!! Haha juz' kidding…**

**2Lazy2MakeAnAccount****-How can you say no pressure if you're really pressuring me?!!! Heheh!!! That's something I'll never say to you…Thanks for liking it!!! I hope you look forward for the upcoming chapters!!!**

**Blackcat xoxo****-I hope you think of this as an amazing chapter!!! I really hope so!!! Oh and judging by your account name, are you a fan of the anime Black Cat? Juz' asking though…hehe!!!**

**You rock guys, your wonderful reviews brought inspiration to my fragile heart…Hope we can be buddies guyz!! **

**Haha!!!**

**Be sure to listen to the song ****Almost**** by Bowling for Soup!!! It's awesome!!! Or try ****Lovegame**** by Lady Gaga you definitely should listen to this one!!!**

**How to be Happy if you're Sad:**

**Start laughing hysterically!!! Even if there's no reason!!! Just being so stupid turns your fake laugh into a genuine one!!! But beware of dangerous sister lurking at your backs!! I tried doing this a while ago and got caught! She even took a video of me…and may I say it was like a horror movie!!! If she uploads it on Youtube I'll be sure to tell you the URL! Just be careful not to have a nightmare alright?!!**

**Share your laughs with me too!!! Oh n' expect something waaaaay better next chapter!!! **

**Sayonara pipz!!! **


	3. The Prince and I

**The Prince and I**

Yesterday, I felt for the first time, what you would call extreme emotions. Emotions that could easily make or break a fragile woman's heart. I was scared to death by just hearing the curses of that Sadako woman. I was shocked to the core when a woman who has severe osteoporosis stand up in a jiff with no worries at all. I was almost wooed by a hot babe with giant melons. And I practically regret leaving all those wonderful jewels in that damn maze. What's more, I didn't get to be the butler at all. Guy number one hundred seventy six, someone named Sebastian, got the spot. And must I say he did show pretty much what it takes to survive in the underworld. He was the only one who managed to scare his opponent to actually admit defeat with just a simple glare. He who was able to distinguish the poisoned tea by tasting it, and did not die or was harmed, he who was able to know the end of the maze by simply observing his surroundings and using his keen sense of direction and ignoring the monsters who tried to hinder him (he reached the end within a minute and a half) and he who was able to gather all of the judges' favor by…extreme methods I might say.

Though I did feel bad about losing without even putting much effort into it, thanks to the stupid narrator, I was given a job. Unfortunately, the old man took my excitement as an agreement. And now…I was dragged to some guy's room. For reasons, that inevitably may not reach your minds yet.

I was going to become some guy's gay lover. A gay lover stands for having a relationship with a fellow male, and perhaps…just maybe doing _it_ with them. But I hope not. I'll immediately be found out and my head would be dangling in the middle of the street with a sign board saying: "See here an assassin would go as far as cross dressing!" Not bad, it may become the root of some sort of Gay protest or the Flower Boys revolt. That'll surely make a mark in history.

I did try to turn down the offer but then….

"How could you? What right do you have to unwillingly deny your prince's protection?! The right hand of the next heir to the royal throne?! Go in the room before I subsidize you, mutilate your rotting body and donate your organs to someone more worthy of them!!!"

The old man said something like that with a furious face, a very very furious face.

I made a face as the old man closed, and locked, and chained, and covered the huge door with a giant band aid, the door.

I was in a huge room, like a condominium. There were lots of appliances and furniture but it didn't take up much space. It didn't even cover half the room.

Sighing, I sat down on the bed and bounced playfully. The bed was so soft. The mattress must've been made of pure feathers. I did wish it would be cooler though, like maybe a water bed or a glow in the dark bed, or maybe a bed of animal skins.

A gentle melody filled my ears. The melody was soothing and calm.

This song, I've heard it before. I can't remember when or how, but I know it. Somewhere in my heart knew.

I followed the sound to the origin of such marvelous play.

A golden haired angel, playing a violin, with his blue eyes closed, his white polo unbuttoned (emphasis on this one) with an imaginary set of wings on his back. Oh, and still had a wonderful chest…

Ruka.

Please, calm down my heart! I could myself sweat, an invisible heat engulfing me into a blank abyss. My pulse was increasing. My throat was dry. My vocal chords froze and no longer vibrated thus losing my ability to speak. I was both in a state of panic, shock and thrill, an ill defined mixture of emotions.

Uncertainty rose within me. I battled with myself. Should I? Or should I not? If he were to recognize me as the girl from the forest I was in dead meat. But I was damp then and my clothes were sticking to my body, he must've used that as reference to calling me a woman. The only question that remains is…will he doubt me as a man?

Taking a deep breath I went into the tiled balcony. His eyelids didn't flicker as I stepped closer. My presence must have been too faint to be paid more attention to. Or was he lost in another world created by his music?

After a while, he stopped playing and took a shallow breath. Then, I could see the blue ocean again.

"Ah! I'm sorry. You must have been waiting long." He said nervously. How cute, like a child.

"No I'm the one who's sorry for barging in on when you're busy."

"No it was my fault to begin with. It is rude and negligent for me to play when I was supposed to be meeting with a comrade."

I hid my pink cheeks. He just said we're comrades. Now what's next? A marriage proposal?

**Narrator: Whatever happened to, "Love is simple minded not to mention burdensome?" eh?**

"Shut up."

Ruka was taken aback by my sudden raise of voice.

"Ah! I'm sorry. I was talking with someone…whom you can't hear…" I was saying things a psychopath would say. What am I? A jail breaker from some quarantined mental hospital? It's really that moronic narrator's fault.

**Narrator: Yeah well you deserved it.**

Not wanting him to have a bad impression about me, I manhandled the situation and ignored the voice inside my head.

"So…Ruka-kun what were you playing?" I smiled.

**Narrator: You're a pig, a baboon, a stinky orangutan, a used tissue paper with boogers on it, you are a piece of bird crap….**

I was taking control of my mind and not bothering to listen to what other insults that narrator shoves at me. How could I even listen to her when right in front of me is an ancient relic, a fallen angel cast away because of being too sparkling. He was a male counterpart for Aphrodite, a mortal Adonis, a god beseeched by others as the most beautiful man.

"Oh, uh, sorry, what was your question again? I just wasn't used to being called Ruka-kun. Most people would call me by my title, or add a honorific –sama at the end. "He was scratching his head while looking happy about it. He really did seem like a kid.

"Ah, forgive me for being so disrespectful. I was asking, what is the title of the song you were playing earlier."

"Johann Pachelbel's Canon." He answered while placing tucking his violin and its bow in a white leather casing with gold letter engravings, _R.N._

"Oh."

What else was I suppose to say? I don't know who the hell that Pachelbel dude was, and the only instruments I could play are the bamboo flute and a leaf, if you count that as a musical instrument. My we-share-same-interests-let's-be-a-loving-couple strategy failed before I could put it into action.

"Please do not misunderstand, but what are your motives for coming here?" he asked out of the blue.

Does he know I plan to assassinate the Crown Prince?

"H—uh?" I stuttered.

"What I meant was why are you in my room?" he clarified.

This is his room. And I very well know why I was sent to enter this room by that old man. Don't tell me…

"Ruka-kun, are you the one who hired me?"

"Hire? As what?"

"Hire as…you know…"

"You can't be what I think you might be?!" He was in shock.

"So what I think that you think is what I would think." Okay, I don't get what I just said.

He instantly turned red. I also did too. We were a pair of newly harvested tomatoes.

"I didn't know you're interested in people if your own caliber."

"NO! No! It's not what it looks like!" He turned a brighter shade of red, almost crimson. I chuckled. I couldn't resist it. His embarrassed expression looked like a child who wanted to tell his father that he accidentally peed on the bed, but couldn't muster up the courage to proclaim it.

He explained to me the reason why. About his friend despising annoying females who always flaunt with them and the only distraction that could work was if others thought he really was gay. So he asked Sanzo-san, the old man, to hook him up with a gay lover so that they could pretend to be all lovey dovey together. And when the idea of Ruka being gay gets scarred in their heads, I will already be free to go, carrying with me a huge pay check.

"I hope you would help me on this. Natsume can't take being flirted with anymore, so please." He begged. This time an imaginary bunny head band appeared on his head. And it fits him and his current position.

I wouldn't dare reject him after all the trouble he had to go through to explain. And who could possibly say no to a face like that?

"Yeah, sure."

"Thank you." He thanked sincerely. I was no longer paying any attention to his pretty face because all my senses were focused on my hands. He was holding it tenderly. His warm fingers intertwined with mine.

I felt blood rising and before I knew it, there came another reason why I must accept his plea at all costs.

Ruka and I, in his so called Ferrari Enzo car, which I thought was a carriage with built in horse chambers but was powered by gas instead, with a couple of black cars trailing after us, made our way towards the arena. In other words, Alice Academy, _the _elite school where the rick folks, nobles, successful entrepreneurs, lucky merchants, hopeful aristocrats, prestigious land owners and those of royal stature attend. The only school that demands twenty million yen tuition fee annually and that doesn't cover for other expenses such as school uniforms or food.

The school famous for its high class grounds, birth to world renowned artists and musicians, elegant uniforms and the academy where the Crown prince himself is being educated.

The cars parked near the pier where a private yacht will transport us to the island where Alice Academy lies.

Dolphins came to follow us and one even showed us a high somersault. Some water showered us but we just laughed it off.

"Ruka-kun, I'm sorry about the nosebleed thing."

"Don't worry." His voice, though soft and gentle, has a great persuasive power.

Wanting to gain more of his attention, I got up and stood balanced on the metal grill, like Rose in the old movie Titanic.

"Hey, be careful!"

"No worries."

I did a back flip landing still poised and unwavering as the boat was rocked by the currents of the water.

"You're going to get yourself killed you know that. There are sharks in the water." He warned.

When I heard the word 'sharks' I lost focus and got thrown overboard by a surprise wave. I've always wanted to go underwater and live with the mythical mermaids. I wanted to be able to swim to the deepest trench and search for long lost treasures in the sea. But no matter how much of a good swimmer I am, I could never get tails to sprout from my feet.

I heard Ruka crying my name when my hearing got blocked by the water.

I was sinking deeper and deeper into oblivion, and here I thought water has the property of buoyancy which causes things immersed in it have a loss of weight. Rather than floating, I was going down. I was kicking hard and pushing myself upwards using my hands but I never rose. My feet ached, most likely a sprain. And my lungs were crying out for air.

A shadow neared me from afar, a shark.

In panic, I stroked faster and kicked harder. But to no avail, I just couldn't rise up.

The shark, bearing its powerful tail and razor sharp teeth, swam in circles around me. It was preying on me. A hungry shark feeding on my flesh.

Am I going to die? I haven't done anything yet. I haven't saved grandpa. I haven't become a millionaire. I haven't built my own personal bathroom. I haven't kissed anyone, particularly Ruka yet. I haven't enjoyed my life thoroughly.

I was living an unfulfilled life, and it will end that way.

The shark with one whip of its tail swam towards me speedily, opened its mouth exposing all of those teeth that my flesh will soon be acquainted with and attacked me.

Yelling, underwater, like an idiot, I awaited for the pain.

But I felt nothing. Just my feet dancing with the current of the water.

My head popped out of the water and I took long deep breaths. What happened? Maybe I was already dead.

"Riyuzaki-san (My fake surname)!" Ruka was holding me in his arms.

Sitting up erect and fully energized due to my skin to skin contact with him I begged for forgiveness. His peach colored polo and jeans were wet and his weapon for mass destruction, which he said was called 'cell phone', was dripping with water.

He prioritized in making me feel better and paid no heed to his so call cell phone. He was so nice. A little too much for me to handle.

"Riyuzaki-san come, there's a shower below deck."

He brought me to a room and asked me to take a shower and change.

"Thank you Ruka-kun, you are so kind." I smiled. I waited for him to smile back but was shocked to receive an icy glare from him.

"First you wreck my playing, then got all bold and called me in a familiar fashion, bled on my clothes, clumsily fell into the ocean, almost got eaten by a shark, wet my clothes and destroy my phone. You really think I could forgive you for that? Huh? Bastard."

When I said something about the royal family having multi personalities I take this as a yes. Before I used to see his blue eyes deep and serene, but I released it was mysterious and disturbed.

He grabbed my collar and pulled me to him. If he wasn't giving me such an icy glare devoid of emotions except anger, I would've fallen unconscious into his arms. And be proud of it afterwards when I wake up on his bed with him beside me. But that wasn't the case.

"Don't you ever bring me down again. Or else." His voice was calm but serious. There was an extreme coldness in him. His outwards appearance as a ditzy cute boy was his mask. Of course, he's a prince. He ought to be loved by his people. And because of that need, he was able to deceive others, and me.

My beautiful angel has turned into a devil. Bad boys are hot, but can't really see him as a cold, lying, deceiving, and despicable, scheming, handsome, asshole with a perfect chest.

"You're only here because I'm sick of those pesky fan girls. Don't misunderstand, I won't treat you like you're special." He turned around giving me a perfect view of his back.

"Oh and, I absolutely detest men like you." He said before he left.

I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to feel relieved that he's indeed a straight guy, or let down because the angelic Ruka had transformed into a devil. I was scared out of my wits, but his change made my heart beat faster. I have a fetish for bad boys.

I like the warm Ruka, his sweet smile, his kindness but I also like the cool Ruka, he makes me swoon, and he's much manlier.

I went back upstairs after taking a bath and changing.

"You're finished? Good, you made me worried there." I shivered. He gave me a fake smile. Obviously, what he meant was the opposite of what he was saying. He thinks I'm just a heavy burden, a hindrance to the ship.

Since I know of his double personality, I was having a hard time determining the true meaning of his ambiguous words.

"We'll be arriving now, your highness." The captain said.

A huge island came to view. Alice Academy is the real deal, owning an entire island.

I whistled.

The ship parked at the dock.

Maids welcomed us in two lines.

"Act accordingly. Act rashly, I'll kill you." Ruka whispered. I almost fainted when his warm breath touched my ears.

As we walked between the two rows of blushing maids, Ruka had his arm around my waist. I could see the disapproval not to mention disappointment in their faces. Their admirable prince, whom all of them fell for, is gay.

"Ringo-san, be sure to bring my love to the manor unharmed." Ruka ordered his butler, a man that looks exactly the same as the old man, maybe his twin.

_My love, _was what he called me. Ah…music to my ears. If only this fake fling was real…

"Dress him in more appropriate clothing since he'll be coming with me to the academy this evening. Please prepare the necessary arrangements for his wardrobe."

After giving his orders, Ruka drove off in a separate car.

"Sir, if you please." Old man number two bowed and opened the door of a black Mercedes Benz.

I sat down snugly at the back seat.

Ruka's manor was located a few kilometers east of Alice Academy. I believe his title as a Prince entitles him to certain privileges including having his own home in the school premises. Alice Academy is a boarding school, so rather than being home schooled, the rich students attend prestigious school instead. But certainly other students didn't have the luxury of having their own house in the island. Ruka really is something.

The manor was an Elizabethan mansion with an extravagant foyer and a miniature version of the palace garden. Chandeliers in crystals and diamonds dangled above me, and a fine carpet of intricate design colored the floors in rubicund shades.

Maids flocked over me and brought me to the manor's pool. My dreams of having a bath tub shattered instantly as I came upon the ravishing thirty meters long pool of fresh water.

"Allow us to bathe you sire." One aspiring maid offered but I turned it down. I kindly asked them to leave, I wouldn't want them to discover that I a man in their eyes, has breasts (just not big enough) and no _thingy_. Imagine their reactions, that'll trigger some sort of turmoil I'm sure.

After lounging in the pool for half an hour, I wore a loose bathrobe and permitted the maids to enter since I'm done.

They brought me to the guest room, where they nauseatingly pleaded for them to dress me.

"I'm sorry but…there's only one person whom I could show my body." I reasoned.

Perhaps they must've misunderstood when I said that and left without a word. I did hear one girl say, "The prince isn't a virgin anymore, him and that guy must've done it.

Ringo-san prepared a pink polo with calved sleeves, a black tux to go over it with a matching pair of black glossy slacks, beige Berluti Rapiécés Reprisés leather shoes and a red rose that goes to the tux's breast pocket.

My long hair was cut in half and was styled in an asymmetrically, in a long razor layered bob, with red oak highlights and fly away bangs. I was surprised with the result. All features of possible femininity vanished. I was a guy. A hot one at that.

A make up artist applied moisturizer and little powder on my face since she said my looks stand out best without applying so much make up and added cherry flavored lip gloss unto my lips.

A dermatologist also came by and gave me lotions and treatments for my scars and some visible bruises. He also gave me a skin hydrating milk with UV ray SPF 70 protection to be used three times a day for my dry skin.

A perfectionist old hag gave me few pointers about etiquette and briefed me above manners, behavior and self control against temptation to make out in public. "Better to keep your male to male affection out of public, it's disgusting." She said.

A priest also visited to lecture me about the same thing the perfectionist taught me, self control.

A member of the Alice Academy faculty, a curly haired blonde dude wearing a Shakespearian (bubble sleeved) shirt and hot pink skinny jeans with a fake mustache briefed me about the school regulations, faculty and the students. He also spoke his thoughts of considering dating him instead in a joking manner.

"Are you gay?" I asked. He replied with a knowing smile. Better distance myself from him as much as possible.

"I'm looking forward to see-ing you again, Mi-ka-e-ru-kun." He blew into my ear.

He also said something weird. "Oh and If you think the students are, well, let's just say inhumane, don't be shocked. It's normal. But you should know about it, you're dating Ruka-kun after all." And gave me a flying goodbye kiss.

"You look wonderful, sire." Ringo-san complimented, while the maids squealed.

Since I'm not anyone of noble stature, they treated me like one of them and flocked over me.

"Waa! Mikaeru-kun you look so handsome!"

"Yeah Mikaeru-san you're hot!!!"

"If ever you feel inferior about your relationship with the young master please don't feel reluctant in starting anew and dating one of us!!!"

I just laughed along with them.

I chatted with them while Ringo-san was carrying my luggage to the trunk of the car.

But we stopped once we felt a menacing aura being emitted from Ringo-san's body. I'm sure he really was the old man's twin.

We headed off toward Alice Academy. The maids giggled as I gave them a departing wink. They called out and screamed goodbye as the car accelerated. I heard Ringo-san mutter something bad.

I laid back and allowed myself to sink unto the cold seat.

I stared out the window as we ran pass the trees and flowers.

Then, I saw a man jingling on a tree, when he reflexively turned our way. I got a good view of his it-must-not-be-named.

I prevented myself from screaming out loud and choked down my inevitable feeling of shock and despair. Men's thingys signals bad luck for me. And this being a clear presentation of _it_, signifies a terrible fate lurking ahead.

But I did learn one thing.

And that is…

A male's vital organ can differ in both size and in…color.

**Narrator: What the hell?!**

"Hey I didn't do it on purpose! It was that guy's fault for peeing in public!"

**Narrator: You liked it didn't you? Stimulated little girl?**

"No I did not!!! It was big and hairy and yuck!!!"

While our heroine constantly argues with the narrator, a pitiful butler was pitiful enough to be over hearing his master's gay lover talk to himself.

'Big and hairy?' he thought. "Master's lover is perverted."

**Narrator: Yes, our beloved heroine really is perverted.**

"I AM NOT A PERVERT!!!"

**Haha! Sorry for making Ruka a bit evil here guys, but I want him to be sorta different for a change. Oh and only the judged present during the interview knows Mikaeru's real name is Mikan, but they still think she's a boy. Haha! **

**Try listening to Move On and Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects!!! It's a turn on!!! YEAH!!!**

**WARNING:**

**Never go to a public bathroom when you're feeling sleepy. Your brain might not function well thus confusing you with FEMALE and MALE bathrooms. Trust me, you DON'T want that to happen to you…**

**I guess I got the inspiration of this chapter from that experience…that's why I still got a hangover about guys and their thingys….eeekx…it really was gross…**

**Haha!!! But at least, most of them are hot…so what the hell?! Right?**

**tAnGeRiNe-jUjUbE08****-yeah I guess we do huh? Hehe sorry but it's not Natsume…there be some sort of unexpected twist in this story! But I still hope you'll love it!!!**

**NekoTama-chan****-thank you! Thank you!!! Haha yeah it really was sort of similar…hehe! Guess you know what job it is now, right? Hehe! Hope you enjoyed this!!! YEAHOOO!**

**Kazukarin-haha I wish I could give you a lollipop but maybe shipping something even that small form my place to yours will really cost me, sorry…haha! Hope you liked this though! Thanks!!!**

**O.o-hehe! The narrator is crazy, huh? I'll take that as a compliment! Haha!**

**Blackcat xoxo****-I've seen one black cat with cool eyes, the left one was blue and the right was gold, not kiddin'!! But I'm more of a dog person, haha!!!**

**pinkblossom13****-haha thanks!!! I hope you'll think of this chapter as nice too…yeah!**

**Randomperson-WOW thanks!!! Hope you'll like this one, and expect something EVEN better next chappie! I'm already brain storming and trust me it'll be one heck of a chapter!**

**Emjay-Yo HONEY!!! Haha, buti na lng nagustuhan mo!!! Haha! Ingats my lovely Athena….**


	4. Fantastic Four

**Fantastic Four**

**Narrator: The glittering sun shine, the twittering of the birds, the smell of freshly picked peonies, the faint melody of Chopin's Grande Valse Brilliante echoing from the music room two floors below, the soft whispers of students rushing to their classrooms with their gentle footsteps pounding the marble floors. It is a most wonderful morning, where the Morning bloom fills the air with fragrant joy and excitement. All of the students are energized and are looking forward to a new week. Perhaps it was the bright shining sun that showered these young folks with radiant energies, but the fact lays that our protagonist is immune to this so called energy. For she was still in her pajamas, on top of the bed, in an unfeminine position with her head almost touching the floor, snoring loudly and is still in deep slumber. Her pointing finger slowly making its way to her nostril ass he dug out a compilation of dust and snot, or boogers in modern day term. Without further adieu, if I may have the honor…**

**WAKE UP BITCH!!!!**

A loud scream directly to my ears woke me up. Due to the sudden motion of my body I landed head on the floor. What a great way to start the day, having a huge bulge on the head and getting yapped at by a narrator.

"What the heck is your problem?!"

**Narrator: Oh please, you should be thanking me. And if I may say, what sort of mediocre **_**assassin**_** wakes up a quarter past seven. **

"Whateve---….did you say fifteen minutes after seven?"

**Narrator: As I said, you should be thanking me. **

Dammit! I'm late on my first day!

I speedily grabbed my towel and headed for the bathroom. In a mere three minutes, I've finished taking a bath, washing my face and brushing my teeth. Drying myself up roughly I rushed I front of the mirror carrying a boob flattening bandage, like I have boobs anyway. I opened my closet trying my best not to gawk at the I-am-rich aura surrounding my uniform. It was a white tuxedo with the Alice Academy logo on the right breast. I combed my hair speedily in the mirror, styling it into a parted bangs emo style. Gathering my things, I grabbed my leather shoes and fled towards my classroom.

Then, a truck hit me. Figuratively.

What class was I on?

I opened my brown leather suitcase and grabbed my enrolment papers. I scanned them one by one, but no class number or section was written.

"Excuse me!" Called a gleeful voice.

I searched for the owner of the voice but I was the only one there. _Must be my imagination_, I thought. After all, I did hit my head hard just a while ago.

"Please look above you!" There it goes again.

I looked up. And shockingly, there really was someone there. A cute boy wearing geeky glasses with short brown cropped hair was taped on the ceiling.

"How the hell did you get up there?"

"Pardon me?"

"How did you get up there?" I rephrased my question. Really, can't the rich understand typical human language?

"I think it would be more prudent if you would call someone to help me on my feet, if you please." For a person literally taped on the ceiling he sure is calm. Is it some sort of trick or was he already used to it? Does the high class also suffer from intolerable need to bully others?

I did what I was asked, partly. I did get him on his feet but I didn't call anyone to bring him down. I did a high leap, grabbed on to the pillar, and ripped the sticky tape with the word FREAK written on it in gold letters. Carrying him smugly in my arms I let go of the pillar and landed on the floor. I didn't show it on my face but the impact brought jolts up my feet. The combination of the boy's and my weight was too heavy for my feet could handle. But I remained in tacked, luckily.

"I give you me sincerest thanks. Please allow me to offer you a token of my gratitude." He bowed.

Never have I imagined, nor daydreamed that there will come a day where a man of noble stature would lower their heads for me, a poor outlaw.

"No need to fuss over that! Haha!" My ego swelled, I began to laugh off the matter and accidentally punched him straight on the face.

Uh oh. I forgot the ways of the assassin doesn't match with the ways of the world.

"Ah, sorry! Sorry!" I coolly took off my tux, and tore my inner polo. I wiped the blood pouring out from his nose.

"Blood…blood….blood…" His expression was of pure horror like he just saw Hayako, the creepy girl in Grudge slithering on the floor and was making her way to him.

Carrying him bridal style, I searched for the infirmary. I got lost twice on the way but as we turned one corner, we finally arrived at the clinic.

"Doc, he's bleeding!" I yelled as the surprised nurses who were previously flirting with the patients crowded over us. But it wasn't because the boy in my hands had his uniform stained with blood, and was still bleeding massively, but because they wanted to have a little "chat" with me.

The nurses in their fitting white dresses eyes me top to toe and asked a lot of questions including my name and how many packs of abs do I have, as the poor boy in my arms never stopped pouring down red liquid.

"You good for nothing bitches what the hell are you flirting about when a student here is bleeding to death! Have some dignity you sluts!" A woman with long wavy blonde hair and shiny blue eyes wearing a miniscule red lacy dress and a white lab gown said.

Finally, a person who could speak my language.

The nurses fled.

The blonde woman sighed.

"Place your friend on top of the bed." She ordered.

I did as I was told and covered half of his body with a cloth.

She handed me a roll of tissue paper and an icepack.

I wiped the blood away form his face and dabbed the cool ice pack and gently dabbed it on his nose.

"So, what the fuck happened?" she said while smoking tobacco.

"I threw a reflexive punch. Hit him damn bad." I answered.

"Good to know I'm not the only person here who speaks the language," She chuckled.

"Yeah, I thought the same thing." I replied smiling.

"So what's your name little boy?" she asked crossing her legs hotly. Is it just me or is she trying to turn me on? And like that would ever happen, I'm not interested in women.

"Mikaeru Ryuzaki, I'm new here."

"Oh so you're that prince's infamous lover…"

How did she know about that? I haven't even gone to class yet, nor did Ruka and I showed any intimacy between us in public…yet.

"I know a lot of things, before other people do. I have the alice of Gossip." She said as if she read my mind.

Okay…I didn't know what the heck she talking about. Alice of Gossip? What's that supposed to mean? Or maybe it was some sort of figure of speech.

Then the boy sat up rubbing his eyes.

"Where am I?" he asked softly

"In the infirmary, you got hit. I'm sorry." I said embarassed.

"No, no, it was my fault for not having the audacity to react."

He pushed his glasses up to his nose bridge and smiled. He got off the bed and gave his thanks to the hot Doctor.

"I forgot to catch your name, doc." I said hoping to make a new acquaintance. I wanted to befriend someone who uses the term "What?!" over "Pardon me?" and "Damn!" over "My goodness!" at least I have someone that I could talk to.

"Wolfram." She blew out rings of smoke.

"Nice name, see ya." I waved.

We retraced our steps and went towards the classrooms. I went ballistic when we happen to pass by an old grandfather's clock with its short hand pointed at eight and its short hand pointed at three. I was forty five minutes late. And I still don't know what class I was in.

"Shit! We're late!!!" I cursed dragging the boy to the classrooms.

"Uh, glasses boy," I called him "How do you know what class you're in?"

"Please call me by name, I'm Yuu Tobita. You should've been told what class you're in. The academy sends representatives to brief us about it, and he tells you what kind of alice you have. With that you'll be classified depending on your alice type."

I recalled the blonde gay dude. I don't remember him talking about classes or anything, or maybe I wasn't just paying attention, after all, I was sort of sleepy that time. And what's with these people? They keep on blabbering about alice this alice that? Who's alice anyway?

Yuu probably sensing my discomfort continued, "But, you could always ask to the teachers."

I brightened up. "Thanks Tobiyuu. My name's Mikaeru Ryuzaki."

"Tobiyuu?" he questioned.

Yuu accompanied me in asking the teachers about my class.

"Hey Tobiyuu, you sure you're not going to class yet?" I asked nervously. I might be the one punished after all it was who was so persistent in making him come with me.

"Don't be troubled Ryuzaki-san, I am most honored to accompany you. Since you turned down my offer, this is the least I could do for saving me a while ago."

Save him? Yeah I did bring him down form the ceiling but I also hit him hard on the face. We were even.

I didn't bother to insist on him leaving for class since he would make up an excuse. And somehow we've become close, in a friendly way.

Yuu and I went to the faculty room. It was deserted.

I slumped my shoulders. I was getting tired of this.

"What's your class Tobiyuu?" I asked him.

"I'm in the Latent class. Since I have the alice of Illusion."

That was the last straw.

"What the hell's alice anyway? Why do people keep on jabbering that word over and over again?!"

"Ryuzaki-san, don't you know what an alice is?" he asked both disbelief and curiosity glimmering in his brown orbs.

"Nope." I replied bluntly.

"But you have an alice, don't you?"

"Didn't I just say I don't know what the hell it means?"

"But--…if you don't have one…then how could you possibly get in the academy?" he asked.

"Who knows, Ruka-kun's the one who enrolled me here."

"Ruka…-kun? You mean Prince Nogi? The right hand of the future King Hyuuga?"

"What are you a stalker or something?"

"Of course not," he blushed "everyone knows them. And I mean everyone."

"I didn't. I just knew about him a few days ago…"

"How could you not know about your own kingdom?"

"It's tiring. Plus the only things the girls talk about are their stinkin' rich asses and how nice it would be to devirginize them, like their not not-virgins already." I said making Yuu laugh.

"You shouldn't be saying that you know." He warned, more like laughed while warning.

"Hey, we're a free country run by bastards in corsets."

Yuu laughed some more. "True."

Yuu and I talked throughout class period. He didn't care having a mark in his attendance he said, but judging by the way he was fidgeting while saying that it was most likely one big fat lie.

The tintinnabulation of bells echoed in the Academy and thus first to third periods ended. Students hungry for lunch gracefully walked to the canteen, the total opposite of what an average public school would do, since there it is first come first serve, the best dish goes to the first few people who gets in line and sometimes they even fight over the last carton of soy milk.

"Cool, I completely bailed out on my first day." I congratulated myself.

"A red mark on my attendance…a red mark…and there should've been a quiz today…I get zero…a zero on a quiz…I get a zero on a quiz…red mark…zero…" Yuu sulked on one corner and blabbed out non sense.

"Hey c'mon, let's go eat." I grabbed his wrist and we ran for the canteen. Which didn't seem like a canteen at all. It was more of a giant restaurant. The students sit on tables and waiters come to them. No fussing over the long line or murdering each other for the sake of a carton of soy milk. Absolutely none.

Three tables to our right, a girl with dark blue hair waved at us.

"Ryuzaki-san would you like to dine with me and my friends?" Yuu asked me.

"Yeah!"

Yuu introduced me to his friends. The girl who waved earlier was Nonoko Ogasawara, one of the three daughters of a rich CEO in America and whose mother works as a chemist in L'Oreal laboratories in Paris. There was also a cheerful boy named Kokoro Yome, son of a famous Psychologist who shocked the world of his discovery about ESP and MPD and a psychic broker of a mother. I was also surprised when I learned that Yuu was actually the son of a great director and producer in Hollywood and a mother who models for Victoria Secret.

I simply gaped at their backgrounds while they sounded like it was normal.

"How about you Ryuzaki-kun?" Nonoko asked me.

"I'm not rich. I work as an assass---a field worker in the mountains. And my gramps is just a skirt chaser."

They were paying full attention to me now.

"What?"

"Just surprising…" they chorused.

"If you're poor how did you get in?" Nonoko asked curiously.

Koko answered on my behalf. "Nogi's lover." He said controlling his laughter.

How on earth could news spread so fast? Oh yeah…they have those cell phone thingies…

"So the rumors of Prince Ruka being gay is true?!" Nonoko screamed catching everyone's attention and as if by fate four students entered the canteen with a strong aura surrounding them.

After a deafening silence the canteen erupted in squealing girls and wolf whistling fan boys.

"MY KING WE LOVE YOU!!!"

"PRINCE YOU LOOK DASHING TODAY!!!"

"MY FAIR QUEEN PLEASE MAKE ME YOUR SERVANT!!!"

"OH PRINCESS! I'LL GLADLY BE YOUR TOY!!!"

Boys and girls crowded over the two males and two females who were currently harboring everyone's attention and forgetting their growling stomachs.

Ruka's blonde hair caught my eye and I felt my pulse beating faster. But what made my heart do a forward somersault was a pale skinned, messy raven haired boy with piercing crimson eyes. He had a strong chiseled face a perfectly curved jaw, broad shoulders with long and elegant fingers buried deep in his pockets and wore his uniform in a delinquent manner, in other words black tux with ripped sleeved and an unbuttoned polo that exposes most of his fair skin.

"Fo…hoore day? (Who are they?)" I asked while slurping my spaghetti.

Koko, Yuu and Nonoko were taken aback by my question and the way I was talking while my mouth was full.

"They are the R4, or royal four. Composed of the top four students here in the academy. The one who holds the throne is King Natsume Hyuuga AKA HOT MAJESTY, the most handsome guy on the face of the planet not to mention the heir of the royal throne, and his Queen Koizumi Luna AKA HIS HOT MAJESTY"S BRIDE, the prettiest and most influential girl around and captain of the fencing club make her angry your name will never be heard of ever again, next is the King's right hand man and best friend since birth Prince Ruka Nogi AKA PRINCE OF SEDUCTION, the kindest, sweetest guy alive but he could get a little scary when he's with Hyuuga, that makes him so seductive and Princess Hotaru Imai AKA BLACKMAILING PRINCESS, a dark haired purple eyed beauty and genius, they say her IQ level is at par with Einstein's. Together they make or break the school." Nonoko explained expertly.

I chuckled silently. Ruka? Kindest? Sweetest? Yeah right, I saw him transform into a demon with my very own eyes.

"In short, they're a bunch of egotistical bastards and over confident bitches." I said.

"Ryuzaki-kun! Don't say that they'll punish you like what they did to Yuu!" Nonoko lectured.

"Last time when I accidentally slipped and spilt juice all over Imai, the four of them ganged up on me and took nude photos of me wearing my mom's thong, it spread all over the net and got sold at EBay." Koko shuddered.

"Me too! I just happen to bump into Koizumi-san when she asked Hyuuga to burn my hair into crisp. I was forced to wear a wig for a year until my hair finally grew back." Nonoko reminisced tearing up.

"As I said, THEY"RE A BUNCH OF EGOTISTICAL BASTARDS AND OVER CONFIDENT OVER BITCHES." I said out loud.

All became silent. Nonoko, Koko and Yuu stared at me in disbelief.

I heard footsteps nearing our table.

I turned around.

One pair of angry eyes, two expressionless ones, and one shocked, met up with my aloof ones.

"What did you call us newbie?" Koizumi demanded her hands on her hips. I got a good view of her cleavage. One word, Fake. It was all padding.

I stood up from my seat and gave Ruka a smirk. He looked calm on the outside but I could feel his boiling anger being transmitted to me telepathically.

"Deaf? I called you're a bunch of egotistical bastards and over confident bitches." I said. Yuu, Nonoko and Koko's jaws fell down to the floor.

Natsume suddenly raise his hand where a ball of fire formed.

Can people actually do that?

He began playing with the fire tossing it and making it bigger. The air-conditioned canteen soon became the Sahara dessert.

Hotaru took out a small metal cube that grew into a life size robot with a built in digger on its knuckles like what Wolverine has.

Koizumi just glared at me while Ruka was sending me death vibes.

"Oi, bastard, do you know whom you are talking to?" Natsume said with an icy glare.

"Yeah, the four of you." Either my answer was downright stupid or cool and sarcastic.

"Ryuzaki-kun…Natsume ha the fire alice…he's not to be messed with!" Yuu warned.

"Oh? Iinchou, you seem to be well acquainted with this fella." Koizumi said and went to him.

She got his glasses, threw it to the floor and stepped on it, crushing the lens into pieces. Then she yanked his hair hard making him cry. I feel sad for Yuu being beaten up by a girl. But that wasn't the point they were bullying my new friend.

"Heads up Luna." I banged the table on one side making it flip. The water filled goblets flew in the air hurting no one, but making Koizumi dripping wet.

"You…" she awfully angry now. No one dares wet the academy's pampered princess. No one, except this handsome newbie who almost tried to hit her head with a table and almost getting hit by flying glasses and food.

Natsume and the gang were planning how to kill me now. Their eyes were all flaming balls of their fury.

Out of thin air a fire dragon, literally, a dragon made of fair swooped down and encircled Natsume.

"You're dead newbie." He growled.

He summoned two more dragons and commanded them to attack me. Shit. People were going to get hurt. Some table cloths were already burning. I might get blamed for the falling into ashes of the academy.

So I did what my mind managed to think of using my limited supply of brain cells.

I ducked my head when one fire dragon dove down and ran and jumped and dangled on Ruka's neck.

"KYAAA!!!" I squealed like a gurly girl.

The fire dragons dissolved into nothing and I could feel the cold again.

"Honey!!! What happened when that Mikaeru took over me and my body?" I said faking innocence.

"What the fuck are you talking about newbie?!" Koizumi shouted.

"Scary…I'm sorry…whatever Mikaeru did…he's a lil' sensitive…" I hid behind Ruka.

I glanced at Yuu and gave him a nod he smiled knowingly.

"Koizumi-san, Ryuzaki-san has the gender transformation alice. It gets activated once she eats ravioli…" Yuu made up.

There were oohs and ahhs while Natsume raised his brow. Even Ruka was silenced by the unexpected turn of events.

"Don't lie to me Riyuzaki bastard!!!" Koizumi went on a rampage and slapped me on the cheek.

I intentionally fell down on the floor, looked up at her with puppy dog eyes with tears forming on the sides in a cute pout. "My name's Mikan…"

She stepped back.

"He does seem like a female…"

"Maybe that really is his alice…"

"So it wasn't his fault…"

The students whispered.

"Don't fool with me!" Koizumi didn't want to step down. She got a plate of ravioli and hurled it towards my face. It hit me straight on the face.

Wiping my face, I stood up and dusted my uniform.

"That's all you got ya damn bitch?" I said flicking my hair. I heard the whimpers of girls who have fallen for me. Perfect. My plan is going along well.

Briskly walking toward her, I neared my face making her blush deep crimson.

"Sorry babe." I said brushing my lips on hers.

Her whole body became immobilized and her skin turned bright red.

Dramatically I knelt down on the floor.

"What happened?" I asked in a cute pout.

Koizumi was still frozen on the spot while Hotaru was taking pictures of me with money signs in her eyes.

"Ah! Ruka-pyon!!!" I squealed and ran up to Ruka once again.

"Ruka, do you know him…or her?" Natsume asked his voice serious.

I answered for Ruka. "Of course!!! We're lovers after all, ne? Ru-ka-pyon?" I imitated what the Narumi the gay did to me. Turned out, it really works. Ruka's face was turning redder and redder.

There were few girls crying NOOOO! But most of them were giving me supportive smiles and cheers.

"It's alright if you're a guy or girl Riyuzaki-chan! Not even gender could hinder true love!!!"

"Arigato minna!!!" I smiled and gained myself a few drooling boys.

"Tsk." Natsume grunted.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Yuu doing thumbs up while Koko and Nonoko still can't get over what just happened.

Natsume departed the room alone. Ruka and Koizumi were rushed to the infirmary. Hotaru decided to make Mikaeru-Mikan her new model.

I went back to my room panting. The ruckus earlier totally drained my energy.

I smiled inwardly, I out smarted the R4. Ha! Take that!!!

My smile disappeared when it dawned to me.

"I JUUUUUUUUUSSSTTTT KISSSED KOIZUMIIIIIII!!!" I screamed.

The song "I Kissed a Girl" flooded my ears. I ran to the bathroom and started brushing my teeth wildly.

**Narrator: It's alright, it happens to all of us.**

"Really?" I said pausing for a moment.

**Narrator: Haha! Do you honestly believe me? Of course it doesn't! You're way too gullible.**

I continued brushing my teeth and wiping my lips until there was no toothpaste left.

**THE NEXT DAY**

In the hallways…

I looked unmoving at the poster before my eyes. Some students also stopped to see the poster and those who happen to see it began laughing their hearts out.

It had a picture of me kissing Koizumi hotly and me blowing on Ruka's ear in an erotic angle. What a threesome…

"_A YAOI (BOY TO BOY RELATIONSHIP) OR A YURI (GIRLTO GIRL RELATIONSHIP) WHICH ONE IS IT!" It wrote._

My face paled, drained all out of blood.

At the upper right hand corner of the poster was my picture in it with the caption "The rise of the new genre YAOURI!!!"

My body paled, drained all out of blood.

**Narrator: Hey yaouri…**

"Shut up!"

**Narrator: For a girl…you really like kissing girls don't you?**

"I said shut up!" I banged my head on the pavement until it bled. The janitress was astonished to see a face of a person on the floor.

"The new kid's a damn retard!!!"

**Narrator: Indeed, our beloved heroine is a retard.**

"I AM NOTTTT!!!"

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**Yo guys!!! Haha! Be sure to listen to Katy Perry's Hot n' Cold, Thinking of You and of course I Kissed a Girl!!! HAHAH!!!**

**When riding an airplane, be sure to go to the bathroom before the airplane goes into a storm. Why? Because the plane tosses and turns, in other words, anything you spill inside the toilet goes out. And trust me not even Victoria Secret cologne could rid of the smell…hahah!!! Heed my advice pipz!**

**Kara Nightingale**-**YOU ARE HILARIOUS!!! Haha thanks for the uber long review by the way and honestly it made me tense…but thank you very much I like being pressured actually call me a masochist if you like…okay…you're right I wanted my fanfic to be sorta different form the others…I want Ruka to have a bad side…I wanted Natsume to appear to be just a minor character till later chapters wherein he'll be present a lot…the timezone in my story is like the one used in Goong, ya know? Sort of like a modern monarchial era!!! Haha! Even I can't decide which is which so I went for the one in the middle…hehe!!! I like historical stuff, but I love cars..I couldn't help not putting cars in my fanfic!!! HAHA! Hope you'll love this chapter!!! Please comment on me again!!! I TRULY appreciate your critiques!!! P.S. THIS HERE IS AN AWESOME PERSON FOLKS!!! Peace out.**

**Emjietooy****-Yo wifey, haha! Sana magustuhan mo 2!! HOHOHHO! XD :D :P**

**Kazukarin****-Yeah it really happened…and the part where Mikan happened to see some guy peeing and saw his thingy is my reality…Haha!! I wish you don't have too much bad luck like I do!!! How bout' you send me money, I'll ship ya the lollipops?**

**CRAZINESSxp****- Hehe sorry but I wanted it to be a lil' different, there like five stories that I've read where Mikan's the gay lover of Natsume, so I wanted this to be…….awesome!!! haha! Don't worry…I won't risk your excitement for a boring fanfic!!! Haha! Thou shall not underestimate me!!! Oh n' yeah Sebastian here is the Sebastian from Kuroshitsuji haha I couldn't think of any other name so I went for a name I know so very well…KUROSHITSUJI ROCKS!!! Ehem…hope you loved this chapter!!!**

**Blackcatxoxo****- Sorry about the weird plot…but dun worry, there's something I've got in store for all of you!!! Haha!!! As they say, excitement comes when one feels frustrated……oh damn….sorry to frustrate you!!! HAHA! XD :D :P**

**tAnGeRiNe-jUjUbE08****- Haha! You know me well…of course there's something "in store" for you…I'm Natsume's fan, why the hell would I create a fanfic about Ruka and Mikan!!! HAHAHAH!!! Hope you liked this!!! I really really really hope you do!!! Thanks for everything!!!ROCK ON!**


	5. It's a BoyGirl Thing

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice, because if I did, the manga will immediately start at fifteen years of age and have lots of kissing scenes in it. Haha! (Sorry forgot to put this on previous chapters)**

**It's a Boy-Girl thing**

"Please…ah…stop…" A sweaty Ruka begged. His hands were bruised by the ropes tying his wrists unto a wooden chair.

"No! Please! Stop!" A crying Natsume pleaded as the chains binding his hands on a flat experimental table tightened.

As they whimpered, screamed, moaned in pain, I grinned.

"Scream louder!!!" I commanded as I hit them both with a black leather whip.

"AH!" They began to pant, their breaths uneven.

I continued hitting them as visible lines appear in their wounded bodies. Natsume's chest was bleeding badly while Ruka remained shaking in fear and hopelessly begged for me to stop.

I went towards Ruka, got out my hand knife and ripped off his dirty white polo. I pressed my finger on one bruise as a jolt of pain rang through his veins.

"Does it hurt my little bunny?" I whispered in his ear.

"Ah…yes…" he replied taking shallow breaths.

"Hmmm? Doesn't pain feel good?" I said licking my lips. I went closer to his face and licked the tiny wound near his upper lip.

I turned my heels around and faced the dejected Natsume lying helplessly on the long rectangular table.

"Having fun? Sweet kuro neko?" I asked while ruffling his soft raven locks away from his pained eyes.

He faced away, humiliated.

I bit back my laughter and hit him again with my whip right on his stomach.

Slowly, I went on top of him lifting his torn Abercrombie and Fitch shirt in the process. I massaged his abdomen and cupped his damp cheeks.

"Let's have some more fun my dear kuro neko. A lot of fun." I said and gave him a deep passionate kiss. After a few seconds of trying to push me away, he surrendered. And as we separated he gasped deeply for air.

"Tastes like strawberries neko-chan."

"Now…Ruka…watch and see the path to adulthood!" I proclaimed as tears trickled down his face.

Slowly, I unbuckled Natsume's belt. Unbuttoned his jeans and pulled it down. And with my fingers digging to his skin I lowered his Calvin Klein boxers…

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"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" I screamed waking up.

I inhaled rapidly trying to breathe as much oxygen as possible and at the same time trying to calm my palpitating heart, which I'm sure is about to get have an attack.

What kind of dream was that? I slapped my cheeks hoping to decrease its ripe red hue. Being stupid that I am, I just made it worse.

They say it's difficult to remember one's dreams. But if it were nightmares it remains scarred in your memories even after you wake up. And as far as I'm concerned that was definitely a nightmare, one hell of a nightmare.

I tried punching myself, slamming my head on the wall, intentionally falling of the king sized bed, but to no avail my rapidly beating heart and my overworked sweat glands wouldn't slow down.

**Narrator: Since when have you been interested in S and M?**

"I am not! That was a…unwanted dream…"

**Narrator: Oh yeah? But admit it, you liked the dream didn't you?**

"Of course I didn't! Why would I like something like…" I remembered Ruka and Natsume's hot expressions. "…that." I blushed furiously as the image played back and forth in my wandering mind.

**Narrator: It's bondage baby, you're one hell of sadist.**

"Shut up!"

"Who are you asking to shut up?" Ruka suddenly emerged from the door adjoining his room and mine, wearing nothing but a towel wrapped lazily on his hips. It was about to fall off.

Ruka? Sweaty…screaming…licked his lips…

I shook my head right to left and counted one to ten.

One…

Two…

"What the hell's wrong with you?" he spat.

Three…

Four…

"Tsk. Anyway, just to remind you, you'll receive punishment for what you did yesterday." He toweled his golden hair dry.

Five…

"And next time you jump at me unknowingly, I'll take you head off. I care less about you alice."

Six…

Seven…

"Hey? Are you paying attention."

Eight…

"Oy, idiot."

"Shut up. I'm trying to relax here. Pushing all the negative vibes away from my mind and body…"

He raised his right eyebrow and heaved a sigh.

Nine…

As if fate had decreed it, as he turned around to go back to his room. The end of his towel got caught up on the drawer's handle. Thus, exposing his forbidden area…

So much for ten.

I blacked out.

Dear God, is this another premonition?

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I woke up half an hour later with an ice pack on my forehead and tissue rolls inserted in my nostrils. Ringo-san stared at me with those I-did-this-because-I-was-supposed-to-not-because-I-want-to spectacles.

"Riyuzaki-san, how are you feeling?" He asked helping me sit up straight.

"A little woozy old man number two but I'll be fine." I saw his mustache twitch.

He cracked his knuckles.

"Riyuzaki-san, I would appreciate it if you would stop creating troublesome situations for the young master." Though I couldn't see his eyes, but I could feel the intensity of his glare beyond those two inch thick glasses.

"Now if you please hurry sire, you are already late for class." He placed a neat set of the Academy's uniform on the bed, excused himself and went out of the door.

I went to the bathroom for a quick shower that turned into a long relaxing bath at the indoor Jacuzzi.

With a huge smile on my face, I went out of the tub dripping wet and wiped my body.

I wore my uniform, styled my hair accordingly on what the stylist taught me so, got my bag and moved out.

Surely, I was in big trouble. I skipped my first day, and am pretty much tardy on the second. And I _still_ don't know which class I belong.

I checked the time, twenty five minutes past nine. I was screwed. Might as well skip the second day than go into class, which I don't know what, two hours and twenty five minutes late. That would be tragic.

I decided to take a little stroll around campus just to get acquainted with the vicinities and create a possible blueprint of the area, just in case I might need it for later.

Okay, there's the main building, with the mermaid fountain front. An empty lot at the Far East, with a small man made lake nearby, a huge garden, bigger than the one at the palace, at the back and a forest covering most of the free spaces and a shopping street a few kilometers out west, still within the Academy's perimeters.

My feet were getting heavy with every step I take after walking for five hours non stop. I was in the middle of the Forest north of the school.

I leaned unto one tree trunk for support and skidded down on the cool green grass. I looked up, the sky covered by the evergreen leaves.

I wonder how's grandpa doing? Was he being fed three times a day or more? Was he allowed to dig into females' private lingerie? Was he able to read this month's issue of Playboy? Was he…alive?

I swear, if they pluck a single hair out of him whether it's armpit hair or hair down there (you know what I mean), I'll hunt those abductors down and tear them apart.

"Look what we have here, if it isn't little miss---ter." A pale blue curly haired guy whistled as his men followed from behind.

I stood up, dusted my uniform and glared at them. He was taken aback but regained his composure masking his inner fear, like what all rich bastards do.

"Is that how you treat your sempai?" he scowled.

I shrugged and walked pass them. It is better to avoid any contact with violence or my identity might be in jeopardy.

"Hey where do you think you're going?!" One of his men, a sumo wrestler looking guy grabbed my collar and swung me towards a tree.

I allowed myself to be propelled so easily, to the pleasure of these rotten bastards. If only they knew who they're dealing with.

"Ignorant fools."

"You dare disrespect Hyuuga-sama in public and got away with it so now you're doing the same thing with us. Unfortunately, your luck's drained out. You're dealing with the OHNFC!" he declared while striking a laughable pose with his boys.

They might be the real deal.

"OHNFC?" I repeated.

"OH HAIL NATSUME FAN CLUB!!!"

Scratch that, they're just a group of loves struck fans, and to think that I got a little, just a tiny bit nervous when they announced their group name. But it turns out; the feathers create the bird. The same with the lamest group name in the history of group names creates the lamest and dorkiest band of brothers in the history of band of brothers.

"Yeah yeah, whatever. I've gotta go." I said while taking another chance in escaping.

"Who said we'll allow you to leave after calling us fools." The curly haired guy pointed his finger at me in accusation.

They cornered me on one tree and warmed up their knuckles. I was in for a beating. Alice Academy may be different with the other schools when it comes to grandeur and weirdo students but their tactics and emotional stabilities were still the same with the others. They still have stuck up pom pom waving flirtatious hags, self centered ambitious brats and narcissistic sissies. If only they would punish students by tying them up side down on a tree for a day like what my ninja school does, I'll gladly beat the crap out of them.

When it comes to fighting, I've got the upper hand. But if it's alice we're talking about, who knows what these losers are hiding.

The curly haired guy had an evil glint in his eye as he smiled confidently.

He bent down his butt facing me as his men put on oxygen masks.

Don't tell me his alice is…

"Crapping!!!" I realized.

"No, thank God, but close to that." Some raven haired guy, which looked a lot like Natsume, jumped down from a branch and landed gracefully on the ground. He had a weird golden star stuck on his cheek but in a way it added to his boyish charm.

"Andou! What are doing here?" Curly guy was annoyed and fairly frightened. I didn't know this Andou would pose such a huge threat.

"Oh? Do you know who has the greatest advantage here?" He said as he stepped on their shadows.

"I can't move!"

"Andou!!!"

They were trying to wiggle out of the trap but they couldn't move their feet. Was that his alice? Shadow manipulation?

"How bout' let's do some…dancing?" he said amused as he took out a marker and scribbled "Belly dancing, 2 hrs" on the floor.

The boys began to sway their hips clockwise in elaborate movements.

"Damn you Andou!" they cursed while he chuckled at their fancy dancing.

"Chow." He winked as he left them while I followed reluctantly behind him.

"Uh, thanks." I said breaking the silence.

"No prob, they were getting on my nerves back there and ruined my sleep." He lay down on a bench and covered his face with his cap.

I'm getting confused. Which is scarier, those dimwits back there? Or this guy who did such a cruel thing just because his slumber was disturbed.

"Shouldn't you be in class?" He spoke out of the blue.

"Yeah, but, I don't really know which class I'm in."

"Hmmm…what's your alice?" he asked.

"I don't---gender transformation." I answered.

"Eh? You're that guy-girl that messed with the royal four?" He perked up.

"Well, yeah."

"I may just know what class you're in…" he said standing up and stretching. "C'mon, our classmates are waiting for us."

What does he mean by 'our'?

We went back to the main building, rode the elevator to the top floor and walked to the end of the hallway.

"Yep, here we are." He said while he opened the door of the Special Class room.

Confetti blasted through the door lunging Andou to the wall.

"SURPRI---! Oh it's just you…" A beautiful pink haired girl came out with a smile than went upside down once her eyes laid down on the half conscious Andou.

"Damn you, Misaki."

Misaki ignored his remark and looked at me and gasped.

"You're the newbie right?! SURPRISE!!!" she screamed as she dragged me in the room.

People in hiding jumped out beneath couches or from the walls or mirrors and yelled with her.

More confetti and gold dust showered my entrance as a red carpet lead to a jade throne.

"Welcome to the special class Mikaeru-kun! I'm Misaki and this here is Tsubasa, we're your class reps."

Other people came and introduced themselves to me and asked all sorts of questions. The girls started asking questions about my social and love life and how hard it must be in being both a boy and a girl. The boys strangled me and asked questions about whether or not I was allowed in the women's locker room and about how lucky I was to be able to see and bond with women, especially, big breasted ones.

A huge feast was prepared just for me as we all informally dug in.

"Sorry if it's a lil' cold. We kind of expected you yesterday." Misaki said.

I felt guilty.

"But it still tastes great, doesn't it?" Tsubasa said as he gobbled down his food and burped while Misaki struck him with a wooden stick complaining on how disgusting that was as we all laughed at their so called "lover's" quarrel.

"Hey Mikaeru-kun, I heard you're going out with Ruka. Is that true?" Girls really love gossip don't they?

"Yeah, sort of."

"As a?" they continued to bother me even Misaki and Tsubasa joined in.

"As a…what?"

"You know are his girl friend or boy friend?" they moved closer in anticipation.

Wait, what did Ruka called me? Ah yeah his…"Gay lover."

Their mouths were "O" shapes and it made me laugh, they joined in and we all laughed our hearts out.

When we quieted down the gossip girls asked another question. "How intimate are you as lovers?"

"Huh?"

"Don't be a party pooper. You know what we're talking about. Have you ever kissed or have you already done _it_?"

"Of-of course not!!!" My cheeks started heating up as my nightmare drifted back to me.

"Don't you want to kiss him?" They asked.

I zoomed in my nightmare and recalled Ruka's full, pink lips. "Uh...yeah…"

Who wouldn't?

"Then do it!" they cheered me on as they pushed me out of the room and towards the Somatic Classes.

"Hey what are you doing?!" I couldn't run away some guy with the anchor alice attached a huge one on my feet.

"We support you!"

Just in time, students came out of the Somatic Classes. When Ruka came out clutching his pet bunny near his chest my classmates took seven steps backward for more space.

Silence engulfed the area and students were shushing each other.

"Ruka-kun wh—ere are you…" Some brunette came out of the classroom.

Ruka gave me a warm smile and took my hand.

"I missed you hon." He said. As the crowd clapped and squealed.

"Yeah...I di-did too." I replied. Obviously it was all an act. But by the way we were staring at each other lovingly hides the fact that we were faking.

"Man, I didn't know gays look good together."

"They're a hot couple."

"I think so too!"

The crowd exchanged positive reactions.

"Ruka-kun? What's the meaning of this?" The brunette held back her tears. Clearly, she's been duped and dumped.

Ruka slid his hand and placed it on my waist. "This here is my lover, Antoinette."

Ouch. That was a low blow. Imagine what that girl could be feeling right now. The love of her life announcing he chose a dude over her. I feel sorry for her; even if she's the type of girl I detest the most.

"No…I don't believe you!!! You're just…acting." This girl sure is sharp, or was she just desperate?

"I won't allow anyone, especially you, to call our relationship a mere fling." Ruka threatened. The female population blushed as Ruka revealed his cold side making them even more head over heels in love with him.

I don't get women.

"Then…kiss him." Antoinette said.

"What?" I asked incredulously.

"I said kiss him. If you're relationship is indeed true. You can do as much as that, can't you?" I'm starting to hate this woman.

I heard Ruka curse. Then, I felt his hands firmly pressed on my waist as his face neared mine.

Don't tell me, he's really going to do it?

Standing still, I shut my eyes hard, as the crowd looming over us stopped breathing as they waited for the romantic climax.

I could feel Ruka's hot breath brushing through my lips and felt it coming near.

"Ruka." Someone growled. But that growl was a growl that everyone knew to whom it belongs to.

Opening our shut eyes Ruka and I faced the owner of the voice.

"Natsume…"

"Let's go, Ruka." He ordered as he glared at me ferociously.

This really was one blasted day.

After constant refusals to anymore private questions in my class, I went back to my room only to be shocked to see one very, very peculiar object placed on top of my bed.

It was black.

It was made of leather.

It was something used to harm or torture someone.

And can also be used for S and M.

In short, it was a whip.

**Narrator: Another bad omen.**

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

As or precious heroine continue to babble, this time not because of the beautiful narrator, but because of the mysterious whip she was using in her perverted dream, a group of men continued to swing their hips.

"Damn that brat!"

**Narrator: Yes, our heroine really is a brat.**

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**YO! Haha sorry guys, this chapter's not that good, I know. But I hope you still enjoyed it, don't worry next chapter you'll know why I didn't make this chapter as exciting as it should be! HAHA! So juz' give me some time to finish it!!! **

**Jeez' I'm really tired…phew…you know what time it is that I finished this? 7 am in the morning, I stayed up ALL NIGHT!!! HOW COOL WAS THAT! HAHA!**

CRAZINESSxp-**haha sorry about this one, there's not much Natsume here! But next chapter you'll see…juz see…HOHOHOHO!**

CrzyChibi-**haha thanks for laughing your heart out!!! Heehee, though this may not be that nice of a chapter hope You still liked it, even just a bit! THANKS!**

Kara Nightingale-**Yo my number one best critique! Haha! Sorry to disappoint you but this chapter I believe is my worst, I guess I'm still a bit tired not to mention freakin' tired! But I still hope you'll look forward to my next chapter!!! I bet my next month's allowance (which is not that big) that you'll love it! Definitely.**

xXh3aDpHoN3zXx-**haha thanks for the cool review! Please look forward next chapter though! There'll be something HOT up ahead…and some unexpected stuff...so please continue to inspire me!!!**

Randomperson- **Thank you very much! Ahha! I also had fun while writing it…**

r4-** haha, I really hope that there'll be a yaouri genre someday…**

kazukarin-**hmmm….lollipops here are alright, I love the cola flavored ones though!!! Haha! Send me your favorite flavors and the money and we could get started with the shipping!**

Arvee-Chan- **Haha! Yeah I am proud to be a FILIPINO!! YEAH! Hope you liked this chapter…:D**


	6. V for Vendetta

**Disclaimer: I'm not stinking rich, so I don't own Gakuen Alice. Duh.**

**V for Vendetta**

**Narrator: MWAHAHAHAHAHA…Another premonition has struck! Something's bound to happen, what could it be? Will it rattle thy destiny? Will thy lips finally taste the wretchedness of the abstract? **

The word of me being the Prince's gay lover spread like swine flu passing the information from one innocent soul to another contaminated one. Some didn't care, others turned green like diarrhea just hit their throats, others rioted and debated regarding sexuality, others were imagining adult rated stuff that Ruka and I were thought to be doing at night since our room are only a door apart, while others rejected our relationship saying it is indecent and against the commandments of the Lord.

My popularity grew from above average to excellent. I was ranked third in both hottest male and female polls in school and all over the internet and have my fair share of praising males, adoring females and idolizing gays, as fans.

Pictures of me and Ruka almost kissing, faces two inches apart, flooded the school hallways while flyers were raining down from the skies. And soon our relationship became the number one most discussed and controversial matter and how the way Natsume interrupted our kiss implies that there is indeed something going on between those two or us two. A love triangle they say.

Flipping through my Trigonometry book, I frowned. What was all this crap? There really is something wrong with the world. Everything seems to be so contradictory. In the English alphabet _a_ goes before _c_, but then earlier during Science it said _c _goes before _a_ and now in Math the creep Disciplinary Officer, Jinno-sensei, sadly also our teacher, said nothing goes first instead they go together. It makes my head ache.

My brains been whacked and my available 50kb of free storage went down the drain. My head's full of stuff about Galileo Galilei, the Nile River, Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë, the Tyndall Effect, Mitosis, and now…Hyperbolas. I want to scream to the world, I CAN"T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

To my body, mind, soul, and heart's relief the bell rung and we all gathered our change of clothes for the only subject that I'm interested in, PE, or any subject at that matter as long as it's not related to unnerving terms such as "tintinnabulation" or "antediluvian" or long equations composed of numbers with exponents and weird signs.

The cool thing about Alice Academy is that all classes adjoin when it comes to PE and Home Economics. Perhaps it was to mingle with each other? Yeah right. Real reason is, his Hot Majesty, Natsume Hyuuga, future King of Japan, said that he'll never team up with commoners and wanted to be with his posse of different classes. And since he's _the_ Hyuuga, his voice, his commands, are followed by all.

"Mikaeru-kun!!! Where will you change? How about you come with us to the girl's changing room?" The girls were constantly flaunting over me and was currently puling me towards the women's lockers.

"Riyuzaki! Boys room." Coach said.

"Uh…come on coachy after all Mikaeru is half girl." The girls whined while I nodded in agreement. The last thing I want to happen is for me to see anymore of that _stuff_ and being with the male population that is averaging to four hundred in our batch isn't a good way to avoid it, it's the contrary.

"But he's a boy right now isn't he?" Coach replied and carried me as if I were weightless and tossed me into the men's locker room.

"Tell us all about what you see Mikaeru-kun!" they rejoiced. Tsk. Traitors.

I was in heaps of trouble. Clutching my PE uniform close to my chest I covered my eyes while finding a place to change without anyone looking.

The boys slipped off their polos, showing their gleaming abs and well preserved skin as they did not hesitate to strip in front of the others, particularly me, a girl, but it so happens that they don't know that vital piece of information.

Natsume and Ruka came into view, shirtless, and drop dead gorgeous. If the other boys were glowing these two were sparkling. Sometimes I think their beauty were too inhumane that they might've been descendants of Aphrodite in the past, Ruka was the mortal Adonis, Natsume the god Eros. And if I may say, they fit the descriptions perfectly.

"Mikaeru-kun why aren't you changing yet?" Yuu, who had finished switching uniforms, asked while wiping away some finger print marks off his Gucci glasses.

"I don't change in front of other people." I answered.

"Yeah, except Ruka!" one guy yelled as the boys began to tease me.

"Shut the fuck up." Natsume glared, silencing them. The boys exited the room hoping to get as far away from Natsume as possible.

"Satisfied? For a none gay, you sure act like one." Natsume raised his brow and walked off.

"He knows?" I asked Ruka who was now gritting his teeth.

"Damn right." He narrowed his eyes in anger. "The main shit of all these is to lessen Natsume's burdens. Next time you pose a single trouble for him again, your name and castrated body will appear in the headlines. And I've got nothing to do with it."

With another glare, he left.

Conclusion: Most probably 80% of nobles suffer from MPD (Multi-Personality Disorder) and Ruka seems to be conquering the top position.

But I do find his cruel ways attractive. Great first I have some sadistic dream and now I'm acting all masochistic.

"Ruka-sama, hit me all you want!" I imagined me moaning in pleasure as Ruka morbidly slit my body into pieces.

I shivered. Weird, just plain weird.

I caught up with the other students who were already warming up. Coach assigned me to be part of the boys' basketball team number 4 that consists of mostly well groomed boys who never let go of a mirror. Our team was up against Natsume's team that also includes Ruka, Tsubasa, and two other unknown species of buff men. By the looks of it, they were clearly at an advantage.

"Listen here. The rules are, one, you may use your alice. Two, you are not allowed to hurt your opponent. Three…BURY YOUR OPPONENTS TO THE GROUND!!!"

"YES!!!" the students replied.

The coach explained the mechanics, safety first and proper way of paying the famous sport and I listened attentively. I haven't played this game before, so I guess it would be better for me to understand it or my team will be last place before you know it.

Okay, the main point of basketball is to shoot the ball to the ring. Easy. The hard part is how you defend yourself from getting the ball stolen by the other team, and if you're on defense you must try your hardest to steal the ball away from your enemy. One must bounce or dribble the ball or else it'll be count as traveling if you do otherwise. Slapping or hurting your opponent will cost you a foul, five fouls you're out of the court and sentenced to the bench. If you are able to manually power the ball downward through the ring with one or both hands over the rim, you call it slam dunk and earn you two points. If you leap from below the ring and use one hand to bounce the ball off the backboard and into the ring, also called layup, gives you another two points. A normal throw, a shot at the free throw line, when in a normal game, gives you two points but if it's a foul shot only gives you a point. A spectacular shot at the tree point line gives you three points, duh.

_I can do this_, I thought.

The boys were situated at the far right of the gymnasium while the girls were playing volleyball, if you consider tossing some ball while shrieking that your nail broke while others glossed their lips as playing, were at the opposite end.

"First match, team's one and two. Ready for the toss." Coach blew his whistle loudly as the first two teams nervously went in the court. Yuu and Koko were in team one. While the other known geeks in the school were their team mates or enemies. It makes you wonder which of the two geeky groups would be the winner or the loser. By their discourage faces it looks like they've never played any hard sports before. They were the types that would look forward to Jinno-the-creep-sensei's lesson with an enthusiastic smile.

One player from each team went to the middle of the court as the coach raised his hand carrying the Spalding ball. It was the toss where in it will determine which team's going to be in defense or in offense.

Coach blew his whistle again and threw the ball straight up high into the air,

The two geeks didn't move since they were still busy calculating in their minds the average propulsion, diameter and force of the descending ball. It was a fight between who has the most active brain cells.

Soon, the geek from team one, jumped, more like tiptoed, and retrieved the ball.

"Calculations, correct." He said and passed it to his team mate who simply stared at the ball in his arms.

But the ball soon flew over back to team two since one guy had the levitation alice.

"They're planning to shoot! Hurry guard the ring!!!" Koko announced while his team rushed to the ring.

Unfortunately, they were stupid enough, how ironic isn't it? Geeks and stupid…well, they guarded the wrong ring.

The guy in team two with the high jumping alice took the chance to shoot the ball in an attempted slam dunk. However, his alice went haywire and his head smashed against the ceiling.

No point.

Team one cheered and wiggled their fingers, it was their own version of a high five, and trust me they very much resemble Edvard Munch's painting, The Scream.

Team one was now in offensive mode.

They were smiling smugly as if points were surely coming their way. They must've developed a battle plan.

And true as it is, they managed to score two points for a free throw, with the use of Yuu's illusions making it difficult for team two to know which one is the real ball and Koko's non stop spilling of their enemies' strategy and future movements.

But team two managed a comeback and earned a heaping three points with the help of one of their team mate's ability to stretch his hands.

The game went on and on, until coach finally blew his whistle signaling the end of the game. Yuu's team won with having only a single point to spare. And guess what their score was 5-6. For them it was an achievement, but for us the audience who was unlucky enough to see the whole thing, it was a sad truth.

"Nice going Tobiyuu! Koko!" I said giving them a thumbs up. A win is still a win after all, no matter how pitiful the outcome is.

Next was the most awaited game. More awaited than a match between Lakers and the Chicago Bulls.

"Team three and four!!!"

Girls stopped playing volleyball and went to watch us.

My team mates being utterly self obsessed, were happy to know that the Queen, Koizumi and the Princess, Hotaru came to watch them. As if, but at least they're motivated.

"Good luck Natsume-sama! Ruka-sama! Mikaeru-kun!!!"

Natsume ignored their deafening cheers, Ruka acted all thankful but I could see deep within those deceiving mask he was annoyed, while I waved back.

Before the game started, Ruka made a show of coming to me and asking how I was doing.

"I'm fine." I smiled, fake of course.

His fan girls who were carrying extra towels seeing how compatible we are gave up and stayed away from him.

I saw small smirk escape Ruka's lips. "Be careful during the game hon." He said all concerned. But something tells me it was more of a threat.

Natsume and I were the chosen players for the toss. My team mates, with their mirrors stayed behind me, in hiding. They were afraid that their man made marvel faces would get injured. To sum it all up, I was alone.

The coach threw the ball high up, before Natsume could even react, I leaped up high snatched the ball, landed and ran as fast as I could.

The girls were applauding while some jeered.

A cheetah, pretty sure that came from Ruka since he does have some weird alice of making animals like in love with him, which is sort of gross, came running after me.

It over took me and stopped making me cease running too.

An earthquake of high magnitude shook the floors making me stumble to the floor.

A shining Natsume got the ball, ran towards our ring, leaped and did a one hand slam dunk. Girls who were able to see his radical stunt went unconscious, forcing the coach to give us a time out as he carried the nose bleeding girls to the clinic.

"Mikaeru-kun, for the sake of our image, we are kind enough to help you devise a plan." Kitaname Kotarou, with the perfect teeth alice said showing off his perfectly aligned white, plaque free teeth. A blinding sight.

The five of us snuggled close to each other and formulated a definite win strategy.

"Let's do this!" We said as after talking privately for a few minutes.

My team mates may be irritating but the plan was indeed full proof and unequivocally perfect, in a wickedly haughty sort of way.

Natsume's team must be thinking what was our little talk was about. Since they were bothered by the way we keep on smiling and sending knowing glances at each other.

But for them they can only create measly conjectures as to what we were planning.

Natsume gave me a perspicacious glare.

The match continued after the tired coach returned.

Kitaname passed me the ball as soon as he got it and ran firsthand to the enemy's territories.

He smiled widely as Natsume's team was temporarily blinded.

Dribbling the ball right to left within my feet I did an awesome around the world lay up.

My fan club cheered and yelled my name as a hired band played a marching song.

The third quarter ended with both teams tired and breathing hard, with the exception of me and Natsume.

I was bouncing the ball and signaling Kitaname to smile once again when Natsume created a huge fire diverting everyone's attention making me lose contact with my team mates.

"You're on your own." He said as I tried to run past him.

Our rubber shoes were squeaking because of too much friction and I was taking every chance to escape past his huge arms.

His right hand reached out to steal the ball and so I instinctively turned around meeting his gaze. At that time, my feet twisted with the other tangling my legs and losing my foot work.

Bam.

I landed on top of him my hands supporting my weight in a push up manner as he lay unharmed on the floor.

"Ouch…" By the looks of it, I accidentally sprained my ankle.

Dawning to me our current position, I looked up, a mistake I should've never done.

Fire meets earth, red meets brown, the flames were so penetrating I think I could've drowned in them. His usual cold expression was replaced by sheer signs of shock and surprise. Our noses were barely brushing, our breaths touching each other's lips.

A magnetic force was pulling me to taste those red lips, to touch those rosy cheeks, to replace the harsh visage of his face to lingering passion.

"Mind getting off me?" He said returning me back to reality.

"Ah, sorry." I stood up, hiding my face which was heating up for some reason.

The whole gym was quiet, only the clicking of Hotaru's camera was heard even the coach was still gaping.

Natsume snapped his fingers as the souls of everyone in the gym went back to their bodies.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

I covered my ears. The crowd went hysteric.

"Mikaeru-kun I didn't know you also had that kind of relationship with Hyuuga-sama!"

"It really is a love triangle!!!"

"What a naughty boy having two men at once!!!"

"Yaoi! Yaoi! YAOI!!!"

"Shut up." Natsume ordered as a blazing fire enveloped the gym.

"You," he pointed at the coach. "On with the game."

The students didn't dare open their mouths again to talk, nor to cheer, in fear of being fried by Natsume's alice.

Even after our team made a show of me eating Ravioli during the game and me wooing some guy into returning me the ball and me doing a half court shoot, the students remained unperturbed by my tricks. The shock they must've experienced in nearing turning to a pile of soot knocked some sense into them and that is, to never go against Natsume.

After all the matches, the students changed clothes and went back to their classrooms like an army of controlled robots.

I sighed. Too bad the student body was too preoccupied of trembling that they no longer paid any attention to me. I was getting used to it, the attention I mean, so I kind of yearn for them to scream my name during the game, especially since our team won by four points.

When the men's locker room was clear, I took off my wet PE shirt, pulled down my shorts and unwrapped the cloth from my chest exposing my polka dotted bra, a gift to me by my grandpa, but learned three days later that grandpa stole it from some village girl, In short I was wearing secondhand bra.

I wiped my sweat away using a clean towel and applied some moisturizer like I was asked to.

"My assumption was right."

In shock, I spun around to see none other than the King himself leaning on one locker with a triumphant smirk plastered on his pretty face.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" I demanded while doing my best to try to cover up as much skin as possible.

He didn't answer my question. Instead he walked towards me in an excruciating slow pace.

"You might've fooled everyone, even Ruka, even me, but you slipped." He said taking his hands out of his pockets.

"Gender Transformation alice? You really got us there."

He anchored his hands at the wall behind me, trapping me within his arms.

"Bu—but that really is my a—alice--!" I reasoned as his thumb caressed my lips shutting up.

"It's useless lying to me…" He said while cupping my cheeks.

"Ho-ow?" I was stuttering.

Here I am cornered, by Natsume Hyuuga, with nothing but my underwear on. I don't even know which of the two is the reason why I was feeling damn anxious right now? Was it because Natsume was so close to my half naked body? Or was it because he knew my secret, and my name, and maybe he found out about me being an assassin.

"Earlier, when you fell on top of me. I got to feel something…pleasant." he said leaning close.

"Huh?…" My cheeks turned beat red. I was also getting self conscious about what I was wearing and the loud thumping of my heart.

"Let's juz' say…I'm gifted with the ability of knowing any girl's breast size…even how tiny they might be…"

"W-hat?"

"Pretending to be a man, aren't we, Mikan?" he whispered in my ear and grazed my earlobe. I jerked.

How does he know that?

"It so happens that you applied for the position of being my butler, didn't you?"

"Ye-ess...."

"You being here, does it have something to do with me?" He leaned closer pressing our bodies.

"No—o…it's my job, to—to pre-tend to be Ruka's lover…" My concentration was beginning to falter. He was too close and he was fiddling with my ear.

"Good." He said standing up and was about to leave. I don't know why I did it, but my hand just shot out and grabbed his shirt.

"This…is a secret between us." I said.

His lips curled in a sly grin as he swiftly took hold of my wrist as he snaked his arm to my waist and crushed his mouth on mine.

Using my abnormal strength, I pushed him away only to be caught up in those enticing arms once again.

He kissed me again and begged for entrance but I refused. His grip to my wrist became tighter making me whimper giving him the chance to slide his tongue in my mouth.

He pushed me back to the wall as he roughly deepened the kiss.

My knees wavered, unable to hold my weight anymore and so his hand on my back became my pillar of support. My will to push him away faded.

H explored my mouth, as I hesitantly, involuntarily, explored his. Like what I've always thought, he does taste of cherries, sweet and delectable. No wonder he was voted Best Kisser by the girls when he was still in middle school. How do I know about these things? It's my job. An assassin must know something about her target. It's not like I was curious about him…was I?

We broke the kiss, panting. Kissing could really be counted as an exercise. First of all, it was tiring. Second, it makes your body sweat. Third, it needs a lot of self control. Fourth, it requires some dynamics or movements.

"Your secret's safe with me." He said with a playboy grin combined with a heart melting wink and walked away.

"Oh and, drink some soy milk polka. I won't be satisfied with an A cup. I'll take this as a sorry for what you did in the canteen that time." He said as he closed the door.

I punched myself hard. How could I…how could I give in like that!!!

I touched my swollen lips only making my face heat up more.

Something…doesn't…feels…right…

I glanced down, and it dawned to me what that devil was talking about.

"NATSUMEEEEE GIVE MY BRA BACKKKKKKKKKKKKK!"

**Narrator: Our heroine is finally growing up. (Wiping tears using a handkerchief)**

Some anonymous guy came out of the boy's locker room frightened.

"COACH!!! The lockers…have turned to iron powder!! And some blood was visible on the floor!" he said.

"It must be the devil's advocate!!!" The coach said.

**Narrator: Yes, it might really be the devil's advocate.**

"I am not the devil's advocate, anyway, Natsume give it back!"

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**Yo pipz!!! Ahha how do ya like that huh?! Hope you enjoyed it! Oh n' I'm sorry to say this but I'm not going to update until my reviews reach up to 50, a writer needs tons of inspiration people!!! SO PLEASE!!!!**

**Try listening to Katy Perry's Waking Up In Vegas! It's cool! Also try out Black Eyed Peas' Boom Boom Pow and listen to The Killer's Somebody Told Me, it's an old song, and a little weird but trust me the lyrics and the tone makes it addictive!!!**

**Look forward to the next chapter it'll be sooo funny! I promise! Haha! Not to mention equally romantic…HAHAHA! **

**REMEMBER PEOPLE! NO UPDATE UNTIL REVIEWS REACH UP TO ****50****! But don't worry if it doesn't…then…I'll just continue on with the story, with a frown on my face, tears streaming down, torn apart….HOHOHO! haha! So C'mon!!! REVIEWS PLEASE!**


	7. The Devil Wears Armani

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice, because if I did, oh it'll be one heck of a reverse harem manga!!!**

**Disclaimer.1: A portion of this fanfic refers to the manga Skip Beat, that is OF COURSE NOT mine. I'm just going to change parts of it…hehe**

**The Devil Wears Armani**

I face the herd of women with a masking my impudence and irritation. I was being extra courteous, extra thoughtful, or in human terms, I was being flirtatious far more than normal today. Why? Oh why you ask. It's because I'm mad. I'm on the verge of killing someone. My anger was at the point of hopeless descent.

I was angry for two things. One, I'm angry of myself, for being such a klutz for actually ruining my disguise, but with optimistic thinking, at least I wasn't busted completely, Hyuuga still doesn't know the his end was coming soon. And second, because I lost two valuable things for a conservative, love hater woman such as myself. And those are, my first kiss, and my private garment, bra to be exact.

"Mikaeru-sama, we are sooo sorry for not cheering you on yesterday!" The girls grieved.

"No, I understand. You were only protecting yourselves; I wouldn't want your pretty faces burnt, would I?" I said wiping one girl's tear.

After I said that, the girls got into a squabble about me being more important than their faces and how they're willing to get burned for as long as I still like them blah blah blah. How naïve, petty, petty tactless women. If only they knew how I'm only using them to undermine the infuriating sensation I'm caging inside.

And oh how the god of time hates me so much that at that very moment, that very excruciating moment that I have yet to calm myself, his Hot Majesty just had to make an entrance with his blooming entourage.

The girls at my side were wagging their imaginary tails, drooling over him, and I have turned invisible. It was amazing how one man, could easily divert everyone's attention from one fussed up guy, to him. I can imagine Calvin Klein models being transcended by this man in a contemporaneous walk on the red carpet. I felt sorry for them.

Being unreachable as they are, the cool King who wasn't wearing the uniform at all instead he wore a Rock and Republic grunge tee with a ripped off sleeves Giorgio Armani silk tux (what a waste…), the drop dead gorgeous Queen in a cleavage-navel exposed Dolce and Gabbana red tube cocktail dress matched with Stuart Weitzman's Diamond Dream stilettos (who knows how she got it), the double faced Prince in a heavenly white lavida Oscar de la Renta tux (I've got to admit he looks dashing in it, especially the way white meshes well together with his golden blonde hair and rich cerulean orbs), and the ever stoic Princess in an ebony black pin pot stretch cady Michael Kors dress, were ruthlessly ignoring their fans screams and wants for autographs. Of course, Ruka being the so called nice guy on the outside, but a cold demented demon on the inside smiled sheepishly as he turned down the offers of the fawning women. Hotaru, being the ice princess on the outside _and_ in the inside, built a force field to protect her against her raging fan boys who in turn got electrocuted once they bravely tried to step two meters near her. Luna, being the attention craving freak, was enjoying the way her fan boys handed her everything she wants, when she wants it, and that includes carrying her like a true Queen on their backs no matter how equally rich or famous those boys are. And lastly, and the very least, Natsume, who was ignoring the protests and squeals of love struck young women by listening to loud music in his, no shock here, iDiamond, an iPod shuffle that contained 430 engaved diamonds, and was waving something white and spotty in the air.

No way in hell.

No way in friggin' hell.

And I'm not talking about his eye catching, waste of money, mp3. I was talking about that _thing_ that he was continuously waving in the air like a cowboy.

White…with blue and red…polka dots?

I felt my cheeks transform from pale white, to an enraged crimson. Anyone! Anyone please distinguish my internal flame!

NATSUMEEEEEEEEEE!!!

As if hearing me telepathically, he cocked his head to my direction and gave me a secretive sly grin.

Steam was coming out of my ears, metaphorically, and my tongue was bleeding from being bitten back too much. My fists were clenched and my stimulus readying to attack. But I absolutely cannot punch him the face and kick his lame perverted ass. One knowing my secret is enough, the whole school population? Not a very good idea, thank you very much.

"Hey Natsume-sama, what's with that?" One random fan girl asked pointing to my sacred lingerie now in the hands of a harassing letch.

Being pointed out publicly like that, the students' attentions were also caught by the fact that Natsume Hyuuga was holding a woman's bra. Which is probably not his, probably?

Ruka, Hotaru and Luna raised their brows in surprise. I guess they haven't noticed that he was marching oh gallantly around school with my bra on his hand.

"This…" He said as he flashed me another wry grin. I just hope no one noticed.

"Is a secret." He continued.

The expectant audience erupted coaxing him to tell.

I could see from where I'm standing he was fairly amused. He knew that they'll get excited and fuss over such a trivial matter. And he did that just to infuriate me more. And he was a matter of fact, successful.

"A bra," He answered bluntly. "Owned by someone _special_." At this, the girls went wild. Natsume, though having his fair share of relationships with women before, had never said, or called any of his past exes, as him having a special someone.

Luna looked at the mostly confused at the same time was trying, and failing, to hide her jealousy. Who other woman could snatch away Natsume Hyuuga other than herself? She was the school's queen bee. Calling her beautiful was an understatement of the century, she was downright gorgeous. How could Natsume Hyuuga take any other interest in a girl, other than herself? Who was she trying to compete with?

"WHO?! I DEMAND TO KNOW!" Luna finally cracked. The boys were astounded to see the usually cool and self composed Luna raise her voice in an utmost unfeminine way.

The other women backed their idol up and begged for the same thing.

I heard, me having an abnormal sharp sense of gearing, him snicker.

My blood was boiling now. Natsume, he, he was toying with me! And was actually beguiled in seeing me suffer in the worst way possible. And I, couldn't do anything about it.

"Let's just say," He said while raising my underwear near his nose and inhaled part of the scent with flared nostrils. "She smells of strawberries."

His little stunt put an end to everyone's bickering, since they were all frozen to the spot like someone had just activated their freezing alice or something, excluding the picture taking Hotaru, of course.

I could've enjoyed seeing Ruka spacing out but was too preoccupied in tuning down the fiery flames of hell slowly combusting me and the urge to strangle Natsume right now.

While the people around us were immobilized, I lunged myself forward and got my underwear from Natsume's grasp. A stealthy trick I learned in training camp.

Without looking back, I vanished from their sights and ran towards my classroom.

"DAMN THAT UGLY PIECE OF SHIT!!!" I was taking out my anger on the poor wall beside me. Even my classmates, nor my Special class teacher whom we refer to as "Noda-chi" could do anything about my violent tantrums. They were just abortively trying to calm me down.

"Oh calm down Mikaeru-chiibi!" Tsubasa said while holding my arms down.

"Mikaeru-kun, calm down right now, or would you rather be tied up in a very smutty fashion?" I forgot. Misaki Harada is the niece of Lord Kiyo Koizumi, grandfather of Luna, and part of the four highest royal courts. In short, Misaki had noble blood flowing in her veins, thus, she also had a demonic alter ego, a frightening second personality, like what other nobles have. Particularly: Ruka.

And because of that, I am now sitting quietly on my seat as Misaki was rambling on how cute I was while my fellow classmates, women, were cursing under their breaths that I wasn't tied up when they yearned the opposite. I guess they were daydreaming of me wearing nothing but bandages with a sock on my mouth. One girl smiled groggily as saliva dripped from her mouth. Yes, I bet she was imagining what I think she was imagining. Girls really are effeminate these days. What happened to the shy and sensitive sweet voiced females who prefer tending to beautiful flowers than making out with some random guy on the hallway or walk gracefully raising her skirt slightly than running on the corridors in high heels while raising their skirts so high you could see part of their arses or get teary eyed when some hot guy touches her and backs away with a painful expression than ripping their blouses off exposing to the world how big their breasts are. Oh yeah, women like that are extinct.

"Okay, class," Noda-chi cleared his throat, "You do know that the Academy's foundation day is coming near." Students nodded. "And that we are supposed to do something as a class." More students nodded. I just kept still. "However, we are not going to have separate alice presentations this year."

The students were quite surprised.

"It's because we have special guests coming. And since the Dangerous Ability class is not allowed to host an independent presentation, we of the faculty, decided to do an alice presentation where all students, of all classes, will be taking part."

"So you mean we're all doing _one_ thing?" Tsubasa said in a bored tone.

"Ah, yes. For only this year though."

My classmates were grunting. What's so bad about it? We could work with other people and the loads on our backs are less. So what're the moans of displeasure about?

"Tsk. What bad luck." One guy said out loud. The other agreed.

"Why? What's so bad about it?" I asked.

"Well, our class is considered the "Alliance of the Freaks" or something like that. You think they'll even allow is to join up with whatever they're planning?" Tsubasa explained while lowering his cap.

"Hey, we also have alices, y'know. We could help." I replied.

"That's kinda the main point. Why we're called freaks, is cauz' our alices are freakish." Misaki said smiling sadly. The class was silent completely taken by what she said.

"What the hell are you sounding so sad for?!" I yelled causing the class to focus their attention on me. "Freak, extraordinary, unique, different, rare, uncommon…does that sound bad to you?"

"If you were to choose between a one karat diamond to a thousand karats black sapphire? Which would you choose? How bout strawberry shortcake to a giant multi flavored jelly bean? Or A cup breasts to Z cup ones? Okay that sounded weird, but you know what I mean. Being different is not a bad thing. There are things we have that other normal people would kill to have." I said as if I were some kind of President imposing charter change.

"YOU!" I called as I pointed to a fallen-to-the-floor-due-to-shock-of-suddenly-been-called-loudly Tsubasa as he pointed to himself. "What can a student who has the alice of hyper speed do if you were to step on his shadow?"

"Nothing, of course. I control his every movement." He said a matter of factly.

"YOU!" This time I turned 180 degrees and faced a stubby guy. "Can you make someone laugh his heart out by simply saying that you crapped a dung five kilos in weight last Saturday?"

He nodded.

"YOU!" I pointed to Misaki who stood erect. "Can you be at Paris, England, Beijing, Tokyo, Philippines, Netherlands, and right here all at the same time?!"

"SIR, YES SIR!" She saluted.

"YOU!" I faced my teacher. "Aren't you the sole useless teacher who could go back in time and learn whether the Dinosaurs really died because of a meteor, or if humans really evolved from apes?!!!"

I don't know what got into me. I just started yelling stuff my mind couldn't even conceive. I didn't even know that Dinosaurs were actually living things who did walk the earth. I just thought they were cool figurines from some Sci-Fi film or something.

"Ye-yes." He answered.

"And who is the only person here who could make boys and girls fall in love with him?!!!" I yelled awaiting their answer with a microphone on my hand, who knows where I got it.

"NARUMI!!!" They answered.

"I meant normally you know using his bear looks?!" I yelled once again.

"NATSUME!!!" They answered . Still not the correct one, however.

A nerve popped on my head. "I MEANT THE ONE WITH THE LOOKS AND THE GENDER!!!"

"Like we said, NARUMI!!!" they answered.

I turned the mic off. "Just say my name, okay?" I whispered as they nodded in understanding.

"I said, WHO HAS THE GODLY LOOKS THAT ATTRACTS BOTH MALES AND FEMALES?!!!"

"MIKAERU!!!!" Finally…

I smiled satisfied, while they continued to cheer and raise their fists yelling all sorts of bad things that other people said and saying "WE DON"T CARE!!!" right after.

"First year, middle school students, please head towards the opera house for an important meeting. I repeat, please head towards the opera house for an important meeting. Na~su~me~kun!, if you dare skip, you'll finally be able to taste my new vanilla flavored lip gloss!---"Narumi's dreaded gay voice bombarded our ears. I felt sad for the speakers to have to transmit something as terrible as this.

We headed for the opera house, which was twice the area size of Taj Mahal palace.

Our class being the farthest from the opera house had to reach their last, earning harmful glares from other people who consider our existence worthless. Other than Tsubasa, who bewilderingly had his own fan club, and I whom other people welcomed warmly, the Special Class was treated with hostility.

"Why did Mikaeru-kun have to be in _that _class?" One girl said while pronouncing 'that' as if it were garbage.

"Hey, don't you dare talk about my friends that way." Tsubasa and I chorused with an exemplary vicious tone. Weirdly, it even made _my_ backbone tingle.

The main reason we did that is to ward of the babbling girls. But it worked out differently than what we had in mind.

"So…so…COOL!!!!"

"Mikaeru-kun!" Koko, Yuu and Nonoko approached me.

"This is weird, huh? Having a joint presentation for the first time?" I asked.

"Yeah. But it's okay, at least you could be here with me…I mean us." Nonoko blushed.

Great now my friend's in love with me.

The Opera House's doors opened with a bang as students of the famous Dangerous Ability Class came walking in like a bunch of models.

I was awestruck of the dark forbidden aura lingering in the air when they've entered. It was like I couldn't breathe the oxygen they do or I might suffocate to death.

But speaking as woman, they were kind of hot. One guy had jet black hair and violet eyes like Hotaru's and had an overpowering aura of intense confidence hidden behind an eerie smile.

I felt Koko shiver beside me. "That guy…the only thing in his mind is world domination."

Beside him was a handsome dark blue haired guy with a satisfied smirk plastered on his face. On his right was a jet black, pale white skinned glasses man, who looked more of 18+ than fifteen who was busy reading…The Art of Torture…I guess it's better to not mess with him as much as possible.

Natsume Hyuuga lead the group, with his trademark hotty hot hotness, messy raven hair, chest revealing polo and his ability to determine breast size.

Finally, beside Natsume was a grey haired, droopy eyes boy, who looked younger than us. What shocked me all the more was that he and Natsume were holding hands. That's something you don't see everyday.

The very presence of their class made the previously loquacious and taunting room into a still aired place with a riveting silence.

"Good afternoon my dear students~! Kya~~!"` So much for silence.

I'd rather die in a chainsaw massacre than hear this gay bastard yap about gay stuff all the time.

I heard Koko chuckle, he must've read my mind.

"Okay. Our batch will be doing a play! Isn't it wonderful~?!" My ears are definitely starting to bleed. Why does he have to add a "kya" at the end of every sentence that comes out of his mouth?

"You'll get used to it." Koko said.

"I have already decided for our play. It's a won-durrr-ful story about a two boys falling in love with one girl! With a twist of course! We've already chosen the main characters, and we've all assigned each class a specific task to do~!" Narumi, AKA gay teacher galore, took out a sheet of paper from his pocket and smoothed it out.

"Latent Class will be our cute service boys and girls, if you need help regarding carrying something or if you can't reach something, kindly ask them for help. The Technical Class will be in charge of design. My dear Somatic Class, will be part of the Invitation Committee, use your beauty my little darlings! The Special Class will be in charge of special effect with the aid of Yuu Iinchou. And as for the Dangerous Ability Class…just stand there, be sure not to hurt a fly, so that we will all be inspired and mesmerized by your gorgeous faces~!"

"Gorgeous faces?" I snorted.

And talk about inspiration. Seeing Natsume Hyuuga's face? Yeah sure it inspires me…inspires me to puke!!!

"I will now be calling the names of our cast and who they're playing in the play. We have chosen the cast based on student polls, as well as the decision of the Middle School Principal herself~! So, if you don't like your part," Narumi face suddenly turned scary. "I will just have to force you." It changed back to his goofy one. "Ne~?"

Don't tell me he's a noble too?

"Please look on the screen. If you're name is written, please go backstage."

Narumi placed a paper on top of an hp projector as the cast was displayed on a white clear board.

**-**

**Cast**

**-**

**Main**

**-**

**Kyoko Mogami– Natsume Hyuuga**

**Ren Tsuruga– Nogi Ruka**

**Sho Fuwa – Mikan Sakura **

**-**

**Minor**

**-**

**Kanae Kotonami (Kyoko's soon to be friend) – Hotaru Imai**

**Yukihito Yashiro (Ren's manager) – Yuu Iinchou**

**Lory Takarada (president of L.M.E.) – Narumi-sensei. Kyah.**

**Takenori Sawara (L.M.E. manager) – Mochiage**

**Maria Takarada (granddaughter of Lory) – Sumire Shouda**

**Shoko Aki (manager of Sho Fuwa) – Luna Koizumi**

It was as if my soul has departed my body. Once I saw…that…

"WAAAAAAAH! NATSUME PLAYS THE GIRL!!!" I laughed out loud. I couldn't it anymore so I slid down on the floor and began to pound it. I just couldn't stop laughing.

Natsume as a girl, in my head looks like one of those macho guys with huge bulging muscles and big man boobs with hairy legs! Someone like that wearing a cute frilly dress…

"WAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!"

Then, I smelled something…burning.

My ass was on fire. I mean it literally…and figuratively though my ass was damn fine for a man.

I got a goblet full of water and plunged it on my sizzling butt.

"Hyuuga you idiotic ass burning letch, you'll pay for this!" I screamed while he stared back at me unprovoked.

Good thing the uniform was made of fire proof, water proof, bad odor proof, and dirt proof cloth.

Yuu and I went backstage where the others are waiting.

Luna kept on complaining about why she didn't get a major role since her face was obviously camera worthy and Natsume kept on glaring at the bisexual teacher wearing a pink leotard. One word, yuck. But I guess even the great Natsume Hyuuga couldn't do anything about it. I guess he weighed out his options well.

If he was to act as a female, in front of the special guests, his parents the King and the Queen nonetheless, and with all the nobles and aristocrats he'll probably be laughed at and get his reputation tainted.

But if he were to reject the position, he'll have to remain in a closet with Narumi for five whole tortuous minutes and who knows what he'll do. And after, both his pride and reputation will get tarnished.

But either way, the whole thing is just too funny.

Natsume wearing a dress! Ha! That'll give birth to another great conspiracy! Even greater than the thing about Evolution vs. Creation or the Big Bang Theory.

I tried to choke down the return of my laughter.

"Excited for the kissing scene, I see?" A husky voice said halting my upcoming laughing epidemic.

"Huh?" What the hell was he saying out of the blue?

He threw me the over all script smirking.

_Kyoko turns around but slips._

_Sho grabs her shoulders and hugs her and they fall._

_Kyoko opens her eyes shocked to see her and Sho Fuwa, a man whom she hated most, in a liplock._

Liplock?...liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?liplock?

"Why does my Natsume have to kiss someone like you!!!?" Luna pointed an accusing finger at me. "Ruka-kun! Are you going to allow your lover and best friend kiss?!" She pleaded.

Natsume nodded at Ruka.

"It's just acting Luna-san." He replied sweetly.

I continued reading the script over and over again.

"Oi."

Liplock?

"Oi!"

Liplock?

A thread of warm breath tickled through my ear.

"The hell Hyuuga?!" I said covering my ears.

I looked around. Where are the people?

"Idiot. You've been spacing out for three hours already. Guess you're preoccupied thinking about kissing me, huh? Little girl." He said with a daring gleam in his eye.

"No-no way Hyuuga!" I didn't sound convincing, even to myself. And that's because, he hit the bull's eye. I really was thinking about the kiss, that I have to share with him. I remembered the way his tongue explored mine and the way it moistened my lips.

I turned red, my face and my body.

"Oh, imagining some naughty things now aren't we?" he said stepping closer.

"You-you're too full of yourself, Hyuuga." I said diverting my gaze. I couldn't look him in the eye anymore. They were wild, and animalistic, and for some odd reason it makes my pulse race. And I wasn't suffering from high blood pressure…yet.

"Got your bra."

"WHAT?!" I shouted checking whether he actually got it or not.

But it turned out, it was all a hoax.

And that's when it stroke.

He just leaned down and kissed me, for the second, twice time! His strong arms encircled my waist and pressed his stiff body closer to my jelly-like one.

My body moved on its own, reacted by itself as though it had a mind of its own, and soon my hands were ruffling his soft hair as the kiss deepens into bliss.

Grandpa trained me in every aspects of control over martial arts and physical pressurization. But he didn't teach me how to defend myself against attacks like this, where all I could do is melt in his arms. I felt so weak. I felt vulnerable. I felt like a girl, for the second time in my life.

When we separated, a minute and fifteen seconds had passed and if it weren't for my stomach growling, we could've extended it a bit longer.

"I've had my fill. Don't worry I'll try not stick my tongue in your mouth during the play." He said and went off, like what he usually does. He disappears, every after a kiss. I couldn't help but think he goes to the bathroom to brush his teeth. I have never kissed before, so I'm still an amateur in this kind of things.

I banged my head on the wall hoping it'll direct my dazed brain to its right course.

I placed my hand on my chest as I felt it pump fast and hard.

"I'm doomed." I whispered. As I no longer suppressed the blush that crept, coloring my cheeks in tinged colors of bright red.

**Narrator: Yes, our heroine is indeed doomed.**

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**Yo pipz! Haha! Hope you liked this chapter yeahoooo! Time right now is 1:41 am! As I promised I'll make the seventh chapter for as long as the reviews reaches 50…and it did! And IT MADE ME SOOOOOOOOOOOO HAPPY!!! HAHA! Look forward to next chapter, it'll be sort of like Skip Beat with a lot of twists of course…especially since Natsume is the girl….HAHA! Oh and pipz! The guys from the Dangerous Ability Class aren't really from Gakuen Alice!!! SO TRY TO GUESS WHO THEY ARE!!! They're HOT guys from famous animes so try to guess their names alright?! **

**Oh n' Misaki and Tsubasa in my story is the same age with Mikan and the gang. Okay? Sorry for causing anyone confusion!!!**

**Try listenin' to Britney Spear's If you Seek Amy (there's a hidden meaning to her song pipol, if you know tell me!!! Haha!) and Flo Rida's Right Round.**

**I'll update once the reviews reaches 70 okay?! HAHA! SO KEEP ON REVIEWING! TELL YOUR ANCESTORS, FRIENDS, FAMILY, BOYFRIENDS, GIRLFRIENDS, HUSBANDS, WIVES, AND ACQUAINTANCES TO READ MY FANFIC AND REVIEW PLEASE! HAHA! Thanks everyone!!!**

**Sea's dawn****- thank you very much for loving my story!! HOHOHOHO!**

**vivacious-damozel****- HOHO! Thanks! I'll try my best to make her cooler so please continue to support me!**

**Dejaflu****-HAHA! I'll try my best, n' of course I'll keep Persona! I mean, in a way…he's kind of hot…isn't he? HAHA! Just wait and you'll see, more unexpected occurrences will happen!!! HOHOHO! **

**Kazukarin****- HAHA! Of course, Natsume's born to be a pervert. I guess, you could say, it's part of his charm. Oh n' thanks for liking the disclaimer!! HAHA! I juz' really want them to grow up ya know? And evolve from sweet hugs to hot kisses…haha!**

**The Purple Wox****- Thank you!!! Please continue reading my fanfic!!! There's tons of things yet to happen…**

**^^!****- HHAHA! Thank you for the review! Please continue to read my fanfic!!! YEAH!**

**Nie iw wt crt****- AHHA! Natsume's always been and always will be a hentai. XD**

**Kikolita716****- YOUR REVIEW GAVE ME A BOOST OF SPIRIT!!! HAHA! Even though I know I'm not that good, but I really am intimidated by your review…thank you very very much. I know you know the feeling wherein you get called as "a best author"! HOHO! I hope that I'll meet up further to your expectations!!! THANK YOU!**

**Killerbaby**_**-**_** I imagine the same thing, especially if his captors are a bunch of hotties!!! HAHA! **

**Hyournihime****- Thank you for the review/comment!!! THANK YOU! HAHA! **

**xXh3aDpHoN3zXx****- Haha thank you! I'm not really good in making kissing scenes…since I haven't even done one….haha, but thank you for saying it's steamy! I appreciate it!!! Oh n' by the way, yeah I really do think you SHOULDN'T be eating candy while reading haha, I wouldn't want one of my precious reader to die a sudden death juz' by reading my fanfic, I don't have the money to pay for the bail!!! HAHA!**

**Crazinessxp****- Thank you very very very much! And I completely agree with you on that, Natsume is born, destined, fated, to be a badboy…for life! It juz' makes him hotter**

**Aka-chan****-THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!! HAHA! I WAS REALLY HAPPY TO KNOW I RECEIVED MY 5OTH REVIEW AND IT WAS FROM YOU!!! SO THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!**

**Kara Nightingale****- Yo My Favorite Number One, Numero Uno, Critic, hah it seems you're still fond of writing uber long reviews! But I like it! Ahaha! Actually, I'm the one who's supposed to be embarrassed by this, I really really want you to be my personal critic haha! So please!!! I hope you loved this chapter, n' please look forward for the next…something's beating around the bush…And you know how I like things to be unexpected! THANK YOU! Also thanks for reading my other fanfic!!! Haha, I hope you liked it…See ya. XD :D :P**

**Arvee-chan****- Haha thank you Arvee-chan! Cool name by the way. It's catchy…hmmm…I hope you'll continue to support me!!! ENCOURAGE ME!!! Thank for the review, n' I'm really happy that I managed to reach 50+ already…so please continue to review!!! HAHA!**

**Crzychibi****- haha thank you!!! Hehe hope you enjoyed Mikan's dream…though it really was a bit perverted…haha!**

**Luna Rei Harmony****- Thanks!!! Haha, of course I wouldn't want Mikan's first kiss to be taken by some guy other than Natsume!!! HOHOHOHO! Yeah, later.:D**


	8. Drag Me to Hell

**Disclaimer: I definitely do not own Gakuen Alice, cauz' if I did, oh if I did, I wouldn't be at home right now doing homework about algorithms and java, I would be in Japan or some other place, surrounded by grievously HOT boys, most likely. **

**Disclaimer.2: And of course I do not own Skip Beat, if I did, I would've known who she ends up with already…OHOHO!**

**Drag Me to Hell**

It's been weeks since we've started practicing for the so called 'play' or drama if you'd like to call it. My batch mates were more than enthusiastic about it, some realized the utter freakishness of the idea, while some people, particularly yours truly, are mourning about it.

I know what you'd say, "you've kissed him twice what's with the fuss for the third"? A seemingly complicated question, but for me, it's more complex than any theory known to man. Every time I see him, his face, that smug grin, that raven hair, those bloody orbs, those warm, compressible lips…

I slapped myself, hard. Hard enough to bring me back to the real world, which is FYI, so damn annoying. His coronation is only a few lousy months away, and time could easily slip past my fingers, after that who knows what would happen to that geezer (grandpa), that good for nothing panty snatcher (grandpa) who does nothing but be a pain in the ass (grandpa).

"Mikaeru-kun."

I mean honestly, why am I even endangering myself for that letch?

"Mikaeru-kun!"

I do everything in the house. He just lies around fanning himself while reading some adult mag.

"Mikaeru-kun!!!"

Why do I have to do this wretched mission anyway? And why the hell do I have to fall for…

WHACK

A rolled script made contact to my head bashing my brain in the process.

I touched my aching head certain that a huge bump will appear later.

"WHAT ON EARTH WAS THAT FOR?!!!" I screamed at the satisfied gay smiling goofily in front of me wearing a painter's cap, a fake curly beard and some Shakespearean outfit, as always, in a fabulous shade of peach..

"Trulaloo Mikaeru-kun," he shook his finger "My, my, you were spacing out. You forgot your lines."

'Stop bringing the play down, Riyuzaki." Natsume spoke up in a bored manner.

"I don't see why you have any right to say that, Hyuuga. And must I say, I do find it quite amusing that you enjoy being a girl for the play. In front of your parents, and probably the whole kingdom too." I teased as a smirk escaped his lips.

"As they say, handsome men make hot chicks. And, it just so happens that, I get something in exchange." He licked his lips, and with that simple gesture I knew what he was talking about.

I controlled the urge to scream curses at him. We were in public, and I might spurt out unnecessary info, something Natsume Hyuuga knew half way.

"Tsk. Whatever, Hyuuga." I sighed in defeat as we continued practicing for the play.

-

-

-

-

Three weeks passed, and the usually empty Opera house was flocked with men and women in fancy garments and grand dresses with jewelry dangling on their necks and golden bangles on their wrists and colored feathers pinned on their hair.

The news that the King's eldest son, Natsume Hyuuga, the Crown Prince, also known as His Hot Majesty, would be playing the role of a _woman_ has spread far and wide even reaching the ears of neighboring kingdoms.

And of course this attracted a lot of attention.

The King and his Queen made way on the red carpet with golden embroidery as fellow worshipers bow their heads or curtsied to their royalty. The King, known to the public as Persona-sama, with his signature white mask, ebony black hair, wore a simple tux beneath his fiery red trench coat. His Queen, with a relevant lack of interest forced a smile on her beautiful face, her graceful stride as her short, raven hair bounced, her eyes, rose red, alluring the men who yearned for her to be theirs. Unfortunately, she was off limits.

The Nogi House came in afterwards. Ruka's mother a delicate woman in her mid thirties looked younger than her age, with pale skin, golden hair and raspy emerald eyes that glowed of true expectancy. Beside her stood tall and confident, was her handsome husband his arm encircled on her tiny waist as he flashed dashing smiles to the blushing women. He was a thirty five year old, in a body of a twenty year old bachelor, thus making him pretty appealing to the female population. Unfortunately, he too was strictly off limits, after all it is said that his wife, was rumored to have a scary alice no one dared to know.

More of the nobles class came in, with their flashy outfits, diamond embedded canes, car keys to the world's most expensive vehicles, cradled by big breasted women or cared for by their gorgeous lovers.

It was like the Oscars, only much, much, much more of a gathering.

-

-

Backstage

-

-

I sat on a chair comfily as some famous barber began to style and gel my hair. A make up artist applied powder to my face and glossed my lips. Some dude brought me my costume. While another shined my leather shoes.

For today I was Fuwa Sho. A deceitful man of lies, but ended up falling for the very girl he used and hated him ever since then. Such melodrama.

"Kya~! Hunky!" Narumi busted through my dressing room which I was sure I just locked a few minutes ago as he squeezed me into a tight bear hug.

He dragged me out of the room and led me to the others for a quick meeting.

As usual, girls gaped over my new look, my extremely masculine features and my total body hotness which exceeds to more than the boiling point of a rock.

A pair of footsteps was heard and in came Ruka, handsome as ever, with his blonde hair temporarily dyed black, his blue eyes covered by ash brown contacts. His was an over all makeover turning him front hot, to hot-er. Of course his unbuttoned black polo did not help in hiding this visible not to mention obvious fact.

Luna came in a few moments after in a tight businesswoman suit accentuating her curves and her hair ironed curly and was tight back in a messy bun.

The rest of the cast, and other students in charge of the set up and photography were there huddles closely together as Narumi yapped about mindless things such as stage presence etc. But there was one person missing during the meeting. And that person's parents' happen to be the guest of honors.

"Anyone's seen Hyuuga?" I asked. As the crew started to prepare the lighting and special effects.

As if it were destiny, in came the ugliest girl I have ever laid my eyes on. Her black hair was messy and her bangs covered half of her huge rimmed glasses. She wore braces that measly tried to straighten her crooked set of teeth some already peeking out of her dry, scaly lips. She had on a floor length floral dress on ethnic design with that looked more like caveman drawings, a denim bolero, sky blue lacy leggings with ribbons, crocs and knee high socks that looked like it was made for soccer. In short, a complete fashion crisis.

Since my senses were keener, I happen to know who the person behind all those geeky apparatus was.

"Nice look, Hyuuga, you look like my grandma, three years after she was buried." I crossed my arms and smirked after seeing his annoyed face.

"EH?!!!" Everyone screamed in disbelief even Ruka had his mouth parted.

Luna and the girls looked like their souls just floated out of their bodies. Narumi, though knowing it was part of the play, him being nerdy looking and all, still cried after seeing his beloved Natsume turning into an ugly duckling.

"Like I have a choice." Came his hoarse reply. Yeah, that was Natsume alright.

Hotaru began clicking her camera full speed as she photographed every available angle there was.

"Okay, students. Enough of the tit for tat the audience is waiting! Good luck to you! Kya~!" Narumi said as he went to the stage.

"My dear countrymen, respectable nobles, humble aristocrats, students, faculty and staff, my beloved grandmamma," he said while waving to an old neurotic woman in a wheelchair probably caused by her son's tragic change of gender, "His highness, and her majesty, you are all here to witness the wonderful love story acted on by our precious students of the high school division. And without further ado, the play will now commence." As Narumi said this he immediately vanished as the curtains were pulled away exposing a beautiful scene of two lined Sakura trees. Sakura petals drifted from the stage and floated to the audience as they watched at the scene before them. A down to earth nerd girl was standing in front of a blonde haired man, his hands holding hers.

"Won't you come with me?" The boy (me) said as a serene ambiance surrounded us.

"Hai." The girl (Natsume) answered staring lovingly at the boy whom she loved and idolized ever since she was taken to his household.

With the help of Hotaru's invention, the voice enhancer and a couple of blackmails from Narumi, Natsume in his girl state actually looked like a typical girl in love. Natsume being cute for once? What a sight.

With the manipulation of Yuu's alice, the background changed every few moments as it showed the way Sho ordered the poor girl blinded by her love for him into doing things she later regret. She never had the chance to finish high school, nor had she experienced the life of a normal girl. No cosmetics, no girl friends, no school, no nothing. She simply worked diligently for the sake of paying the expensive rent in a classy apartment for the sake of Sho.

The scene the changed to where Kyoko accidentally eavesdropped on Sho and his manager's conversation. About him using her as a mere maid in doing chores, and about her being the supposed girl he was ordered to marry but refused violently, since she was, ugly and plain.

"I prefer someone like you Shoko, hot, sexy and independent." I said hotly as I leaned close to Luna who, for a moment there, paused in order o hide her blush.

Dodging just in time, I pushed Luna away as we manage to evade a carton of food from nearly splattering over our faces.

"Kyoko..?" I whispered.

Natsume emitted his normal cold aura which brought goose bumps to everyone.

"I loved you! But then you just used me and dump me like some trash!!" Natsume screamed. If it weren't for the thousands of people watching my every move I would've dropped down and laughed my self to death.

"You are trash." I replied bluntly.

"You'll pay for this Sho! One day I'll definitely rise above you! You'll see! YOU"LL SEE!!!" Natsume continued to yell as two guards, Koko and Kitsuneme, carried him out.

The curtains was closed as we ran back stage and changed into our next costumes.

I went back to the dressing room since my turn will be around half an hour later. The play will focus now on Kyoko's struggle to reach the top in order to take revenge on Sho. Even though the thought of seeing Natsume act like some sissy was downright funny and she could freely laugh her ass at the back without Natsume knowing, she'd rather stick around in the room to rest. But that was just an excuse for the weird giddy feeling I kept on having whenever I see Natsume, whether in a nerd outfit or in his usual yummy self.

I was a bit tired from all the practicing and stuff plus the sound of the orchestra accompanying the play contributes to her drowsiness.

And soon I drifted off to sleep.

With one thing on my mind.

Am I falling for Natsume?

**Narrator: Of course you are idiotic girl.**

"I am not idiotic you good for nothing narrator!"

**Narrator: Really? But I believe you should be sleeping right now, baka. Follow the real life script will you?**

My eyesight began to waver and soon my surroundings became a blur.

"I'm…not a….baka…"

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**HOHOHO! Thanks everyone! I am SO happy that the reviews have no reached 70+++!!! Haha! This chapter is juz a tickler! More humor next chappie!!! Natsume's about to get a huge make over 9in the play) and you wouldn't want to miss out on that!!! Plus, a new character will make an entrance very very soon!!! It'll be a fight for Mikan's love!!! Oh yeah n' an unexpected discovery will be made!!! OOOHHH what will it be?! Haha!**

**Sorry for the late updates pipz! Truly! I'm juz sorta busy these days, so much assignment and tests to study for plus I'm having two Maths right now! Advanced Algebra n' Geometry there's also Physics and Chemistry and not to mention English, English=Sentence Diagramming!!! Oh when are we suppose to use that in real life?!**

**A reminder to all by the way, I'll be updating when reviews reach up to 90++! Oh and if it reaches up to 100++ I'll make the next chapter longer, funnier and a lot more romantic! More steamy scenes, yeah!!! So keep those reviews comin'!**

**Killerbaby-Haha thank you very much!!! Oh n' look forward to the next chappie…haha! Something reeeeeal funny is a bout to happen! But I hope you enjoyed this chapter too!!!**

**keaRy anCe**-**(blushes) Thank you!!!!!!!!**

**xXh3aDpHoN3zXx****-** **Haha thanks a lot!!!! Look forward for the next chapter too, it'll be damn awesome, I promise I'm juz a bit preoccupied with school (hell) these days sorry bout' not updatin' fast! But I'll try! Thanks for the review! HOHO!**

**Arvee-Chan****- haha! Thanks for liking it, I hope you enjoyed this chapter too, but please look out for the next chapter!!! I swear it'll be awesome-er!!!**

**kazukarin****-Thanks a lot, dude? Dudette? Haha!!! Hope we can be best of buds!!! Even cyber stuff has its cool factor, getting' inspired by you!!! A lil' corny I know, but true nonetheless. Thanks!!!**

**Saikono-san****-Oh so you like perverted stuff? Heehee! I'll promise to make more of those! At least I'll try! I'm not that good at it, since I'm not a pervert, but I'll try my best to be one. Wait. That didn't sound right? Did it? Haha! Juz kiddin' Thank u!**

**vivacious-damozel****-HOHOHOHHO! Dun' worry, Mikan will be very……special……you'll juz' have to wait n' see!!! SUSPENSE!**

**xXANobodyXx****-Thanks a bunch!!! Please look forward to the next chapter!!! It'll be hilarioussss!**

**ami-chan-Why shockz….thank you so very so very so very muuuuch!!! How bout' making an account here in fanfic, I really hope we can be friends!! YEAH!**

**Kara Nightingale**-**Wassup No 1 Critique? Haha! Hope this chapter reaches up to your expectations, hopes, hopes, hopes, hopes, but if it doesn't guess I juz' have to battle with you in the next chapter n' make it ultra awesome!!! Hehe dun worry, I like your long reviews, it's cool.**

**tAnGeRiNe-jUjUbE08****-Hehe! Slow down, easy there….I hope you liked this chapter! N' please continue to read my fanfics!!! Thank you!!!**

**sapphireangel09****- Haha! Thanks a lot!!! I appreciate you liking the multi personality stuff…THANKZ!**

**-KateDominique-****Wow. We haven't even met n' you already love me? Must be my charms….hahah!!! Thanks a lot!!! HOHOHHO! Your review motivates me so keep it comin'! And please look out for my future updates, form here on out I'll pour my whole heart n' soul to the upcoming chapters so I promise it'll be great! So please continue supporting me! Later~**


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